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    • #68888

      Hey everyone, just wondering – if someone is guilt tripping you into staying with them and making you feel guilty for wanting to leave and saying that they have never been broken up with before/never been happier and would be gutted if you left and telling you you are being ominous for wanting to talk? And denying putting you down (even though they do it all the time?) – is that abuse? What if it’s not abuse? I feel like the bad one.

    • #68890
      Iwantmeback
      Participant

      Hi there and yes it’s abuse. Denying is gaslighting, and he’s emotionally blackmailing you, it’s all about his feelings and not listening to you. So what if he’s never been broken up with, time to burst his cherry, so what if he’s the happiest he’s ever been, you’re not, and two of you are in this relationship not just him. If this is consistent behaviour and not just a one off, and you’re afraid to leave in case it sets him off, then this is an abusive relationship. The problem with these men is they’re so used to getting their own way, they don’t like being told no.
      I hope you can break up without any drama.

      IWMB 💕💕

    • #69089

      Thank you so much IWMB 😊. I did leave him, I said I felt like he didn’t love me. He sent me a letter (detail removed by moderator). This is after all the guilt trips, the constant put downs in front of others and gaslighting. He told me he was gutted when he heard I had been on another date and that he didn’t blame me for not telling him. But yet he said he has had some casual flings? That makes me mad, why should I tell him – he’s suggesting I should have but he didn’t tell me – like I’m his – I’m not his. It turns my stomach. He told me he just wants me to be happy – it’s like he says all the right things but he’s actually just trying to manipulate and control me and bring me back to him. He turns my stomach 🙁

    • #69096
      Iwantmeback
      Participant

      Sounds like everything IS working out💜💜
      IWMB 💕💕

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