Is it Abuse? how do I get out?

[thevixen]

I have been with my husband (removed by moderator) years married for (removed by moderator). We have 2 kids together (removed by moderator).
I have (removed by moderator) which he has told me he resents. He makes lots of unpleasant and sarcastic comments, dismisses my opinion all the time.
I started a new job in (removed by moderator), all the employees have to complete a survey with their payslip. Everyone commented on how quiet and reserved I was. It was brought to my attention by my manager and I realised I had become a wall flower too scared to speak out. This isn’t me, I used to be chatty and sociable. I decided i didn’t want this I wasn’t strong enough to stand up to him so I want out. He is not accepting this and thinks we can make it work.. he says he will change but you can’t change your personality. I love him but not in love with him. i removed my wedding ring, it felt so powerful. At last I was in control and could make the decisions.
He is refusing to leave the marital home but has agreed not to share my bed. It is awkward being in the same house. I feel like I am walking on egg shell and when I turn round to do something he is there doing it. I find myself becoming that wall flower again and hiding in my room to avoid confrontation.
I don’t know where to begin to get me and my kids out of this relationship or who to turn to.

[KIP.]

It would be good for you to contact your local women’s aid. Living with an abuser while ending a relationship is dangerous and won’t work. You need a safe exit plan. Speak to a family solicitor and see if there is anything you can do legally and also find out what you’re entitled to. It might be that he keeps his pension and you keep the marital home. Once all the marital assets are on the table, you will be able to make a better decision. You might want to go into a refuge or privately rent with your children. Being around him will on,y make things worse.

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