hello Icandothis
having those light-bulb moments, the realisations along the way, can be very shocking and upsetting, but in the end they do protect us. They are moments of revelations, of seeing the truth, of letting go of what we thought we had, but has gone, and maybe never really could have been.
Its a whole other thing the time spent being involved with them, either long or short term, it all feels like wasted time, but I suppose this is life’s experiences, we really have our eyes opened to a whole other side of life and become, no, maybe, grow, into a place of greater knowing, of greater self-protection, of caution perhaps too.
I hope you can feel there are many other life activities you can put your energies into, being now all the wiser to some the pitfalls around!
warmest wishes
ts