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The stuff I have found out since he has gone.
I still have a black eye and bruised face etc.
I can’t sleep in my bed yet. And because of my ribs I can’t lie down, I’m in constant pain.
But all of this is nothing compared to what could have happened.
I spoke to his ex girlfriend and found out he had been violent to her in front of her children and killed her dog.
This man in dangerous, and she is livid she didn’t ever contact the police.
I believe more and more I am lucky to be alive. Even the police believe it.
I am in a state of shock, I keep crying and I feel like I’m going to have a breakdown. My kids are keeping me going but I’m so overwhelmed at the moment I feel like I’m drowning. -
Dear Rosie, i’m so sorry to hear how bad you are feeling. You have done an amazing thing getting out of the relationship. Prepare yourself for the road ahead, trauma bonding. It is really really hard on your emotions, your mind may play tricks on you want make you go back. There is a post on here called Trauma Bonding which you may want to look at. XXXX
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I have tried to call, I will keep trying. 🙂
I feel so betrayed by him, and the system. The police are so apologetic.
I miss him… Even knowing all he’s done, he was so engrained in my life. I never want him back though as I know he won’t let me escape again.
I’m angry as I didn’t see how dangerous he was and could be to me my children and pets.
I am fighting to stop all the emotions overwhelming me.
Managed to sleep for a bit, I have to sleep sitting up due to my ribs, woke up from a nightmare choking.
When do I start feeling better.
Going to try and go back to work next week, but I’m dreading it. And I love my job… 🙁 -
Dear Rosie, try to chat with Brokendreams & Betterdays, both of whom currently going through exactly what you are. Its really helpful to share, offload and get it all off your chest. You ask when do you start feeling better, as the minutes, days, weeks and longer pass, your feelings change, initially they become less severe and concentrated. You might go into a sort of flat depression. But no matter what, the end result is worth it. I still miss and think about my ex every single day, but now I have my life too. I’m trying to get more hobbies and things going on as there is a gap but I made the right decision. We are all here for you Rosie XXXXX
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Rosie, the trauma of what happened was so much to handle and now you have found out just how bad he was and the things he is capable of it makes you feel much worse. You are bound to dread going back to work you have been thro so so much, dont rush yourself , be kind to yourself, you have suffered a tremedous shock.
Tears are healing and the emotions can be very overwhelming, just take things slowley ,can you get any councelling to help you overcome the trauma, take care, hugsxxxxx
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