• This topic has 2 replies, 2 voices, and was last updated 8 years ago by KIP..
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    • #12687
      Starmoon
      Participant

      He’s infuriating the life out of me today and reminding me of what he used to be like which makes me doubt everything.. And that makes me think I should be here again after all.
      It’s a vicious circle and it’s really grinding my gears now. I was getting increasingly annoyed with it feeling like he could go off when ever he liked but I can’t, I was also annoyed at how his priorities are to c**k. (detail removed by moderator)… he didn’t come over until early evening (to have ago at me about the events of last nigh- I’ll explain in a mo) so he hadn’t seen the kids let alone help me out like he said he would (he doesn’t live here again).. He’s been helping his parents do goodness know what apparently. And apparently that is priority. Well only the other day he said to me that If he’d got his priorities wrong which he often seems to do ( (detail removed by moderator) goes to friends and all sorts instead of see his family) that I should tell him and he’l sort himself out… So I tell him in the most tactful way I can think of and he kicks off just like he used to. It seems to me that he’s keeping his distance from me because he’s annoyed at me still for last night. He says he’s over it but it doesn’t seem that way. And this is a classic case of double standards. I was annoyed at him last week.. He was totally out of order in how he’d behaved over the weekend (too much to list) But I still looked after the kids while he was hung over and went to sleep at his mums. He said he was sorry for how he acted which was fine. I didn’t avoid him and I didn’t basically say ‘I’m p****d off with you so I’m going to avoid you and you can deal with the kids’. If I’d done that he’d have done his nut and obviously I don’t walk out on the kids no matter how mad I am.. On the one occasion I did walk off and leave him with them, he called me (detail removed by moderator) because the baby was crying. Imagine if I called him to come home every time she cried…. Grrrrr! So I went home didn’t I lol. Didn’t even get an hour to myself. Funny how he seems to think Looking after the children is easy and I don’t deserve a brake yet he can’t manage an hour. When I even try and talk to him about this he flips.

      (detail removed by moderator) I had Two friends over and one bought her daughter who’s the same age as my eldest. They play lovely together and with it being the Easter holidays we didn’t think it a problem them staying up while the adults caught up. He was at work and due home late evening, he was tired and wanted to go to bed when he came in. I’d intended on my friends being gone before he got home but we got carried away and lost track of time. He arrived home and said he was once again going back to his mums. I left him to it but fumed at him via text.. I let a weeks worth of him doing what ever he wants build up and I was an idiot because I’d had a few drinks. I was also annoyed he went home and I don’t think it was fair. (I understand he wanted to go to bed and needed sleep) but I should’ve left it and tried to talk to him about it when I was sober. I’ve said sorry to him obviously, I’ve explained myself and I’ve tried to talk to him but all he’s done is prove its impossible to talk to him… He throws so much at me like I’m this evil impossible person to be with and its knackering. He tells me I need to learn to communicate and talk to him when there’s an issue but when I’ve told him how I feel about not getting time to myself and him calling me back if the baby cries he deflects it and says I’m calling him a bad father and get angry and won’t listen. when he did turn up here, he made me feel even worse and obviously didn’t listen to my side of things so I said it best he went back to his parents again. I feel so frustrated at not being heard And I can’t believe I’m sat here wondering how best to communicate to him. It’s a wonder I don’t get ill with the stress and lack of rest

    • #12691
      Starmoon
      Participant

      I feel guilty posting this now. Sorry ladies I know you’re all going threw so much worse. I guess in comparison to what you’re going threw and how he’s been in the past this is nothing. I’m just so het up by him. I wish I didn’t let him bother me but I do 😢

    • #12709
      KIP.
      Participant

      Don’t feel guilty. It’s good to get it all out. Try to put him out your mind and let him stew. Ignore him and he will come running x

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