Hi there. You reached your “enough” moment which is good because you are realizing you are worth more than what he’s putting you through. And you are. ❤️ You’ll find a way to cope I’m sure – please don’t resign yourself to a life of misery when you don’t need to. But first get yourself a support network. Can you confide in anyone about what’s happening? Do you have close family or friends? How well do you get on with your boss? If he’s supportive of you then he might be willing to work with you to allow you to stay in your home.
Please don’t tell him your plans and contact women’s aid to make a safe exit from the relationship. It’s a dangerous time so please take care.
The guilt you’re experiencing is part of the fog of abuse – fear, obligation and guilt. Look it up and have a read. It opened my eyes I can tell you. It sometimes takes a few attempts to leave an abuse relationship for good – 7 times is the norm. Don’t beat yourself up if you’ve gone back before because now you reached your enough moment, it will give you more strength to stay away.
Keep posting here for support and advice. XxHDxX