I’ve told him it’s over

[Mommabear]

Hi everyone,

I’ve told my husband it’s over. He has retaliated with the usual nastiness…..because I have not fought back over the last few years and have been cold and distant (no wonder after what he’s done to me) I have been emotionally abusing him!!! I guess this is classic narc tactics!

I have distanced myself from any arguments as there is little point arguing with him. Last night was no exception. He’s twisting and turning everything around and trying to make me look like the bad guy. How have I lived like this for (detail removed by moderator) years?

The lady from our local WA left me a message I’m hoping to speak to her this week to get some support.

He is refusing to leave the house, has demanded that I save money (he’s been out (detail removed by moderator) nights over the last couple of weeks, spending goodness knows how much money on booze).

I need to keep strong. I just need some support and words of advice from you lovely people

Mommabear xxxx

[KIP.]

Hi, this is the most dangerous time for you. This is when I was assaulted and had to ring the police. He’s going to ramp up the abuse. He will try every tactic in the book. Often many changes of tactic in the same conversation. Looking for that weakness to hook you back in. In the past you will have given in to his demands just for a quiet life. When he realises this isn’t happening this time, and he is losing control, the abuse will escalate. I just didn’t see it coming. Living with him at this time is definitely not a good idea. Have you asked about an exclusion order to have him removed from the home? Or a non molestation order. Can you afford to rent somewhere with the children? Women’s aid should be able to help with alternative housing. I believe the council have a duty to rehome victims of domestic abuse.

[Author]

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