Just after advice

[Confused123]

Eldest is bk to same story going bk to old town , have stated he can go if he wishes but has to fund himself by getting job here first and to let his dad know . He has thrown bk
At me that me and his dad need to be civil to each another and talk about where he will live (detail removed by moderator) , I have been advised by solicitor not to talk to ex , but would it be ok
To talk to discuss son living arrangement . Again not to keen as this will give ex excuse to call me all time, plus with these charges I m in process of doing , just seems wrong to make contact or am I being silly I am parent and have to be responsible

[Falling Skys]

Hi confused123

Sorry that you have to go through this.

I think you need to do what your solicitor says.

Sad to say your son of using learnt behaviour, blackmailing you in contact and getting what he wants.

Stay strong and safe xx

[Lisa]

Hi Confused,

I think if your solicitor is advising you not to have any contact with your ex then it may hurt your case if you do. If you wish to discuss details about your son is there any way you could use another family member as a mediator or ask your solicitor if it would be appropriate for you to perhaps email? Is it at all possible that he has told your son that you need to talk to him? It would be very typical of an abuser to be manipulating your son to try to get you to contact him.

Get plenty of support from your local Women’s Aid group and look after yourself. If you do not wish to be in touch with him then that is your choice.

Best wishes,

Lisa

[Confused123]

HI LIsa

Yeah have email my solicitor about scenario and waiting for reply, trying to follow my gut instinct and not make contact, its like he would be reeling me in again and he is no good for my head mentally

[Author]

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