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    • #43505
      Eve1
      Participant

      Maybe this is not the place to do this I should probably ring the Samaritans but I just feel I might as well be dead. I’m not working at present, mostly because my daughter’s been having such a hard time and if she’s not at school I’ve been too worried about her to want to leave the house, in the last two years, I’ve worked enough apparently to only receive half the housing benefit I was receiving. So now I have to borrow money from a family member, and that kills me.

      I just feel like I’m being punished. Like I’m stupid.

      Just sick of having to figure out how to survive the next thing, then the next thing, jus because I didn’t want to live wien an abusive man any more.

      Sorry for offloading here.

    • #43508
      SunshineRainflower
      Participant

      Hi Eve,

      I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling so low. It’s good that you reached out on here. I just want to say that you definitely should not be dead, you are a beautiful soul who is needed here on earth! I understand how being unemployed affects your mood, I too am not working currently and it has been very hard socially, financially etc.

      Is there work you could do that is flexible to fit around your daughter? Right now though it’s best you get your mental health back to a better place. Have you spoken to your GP about how you feel? Are you getting support from domestic abuse organisations locally? I go to a support group and am starting therapy soon, and have good support from my GP and local organisations as well as friends. They have made all the difference and helped me when I was suicidal.

      I would also recommend ringing the samaritans whenever you feel like it, I rang them a lot initially and they helped me get through the times when I was at my most down.

      I would recommend that you just take it a day at a time. Don’t worry about the future, just think, what would you like to do today that would make you feel slightly better? It might be a walk, or baking a cake, enjoying a nice cup of tea with a film, reading a book for half an hour. Something simple that is nourishing to the soul.

      Then when you are feeling a little better and have support in place, you could set some goals to work towards the life you would like. I am working towards my goals each day, with lots and lots of self care too. It’s not easy and I don’t have much money but I am feeling much more positive now that I am free of my ex and on the right track again.

      You are not alone and you are definitely not stupid. It’s tough leaving these abusive men and there will be set backs along the way but you can do it and will be much better off for it in the long run.

    • #43546
      Eve1
      Participant

      Thank you for your lovely reply.

      XX

    • #43547
      Lightness
      Participant

      Hello Eve

      Is your daughter getting support eg counselling or whatever could help her with what she is experiencing? Getting help for her may relieve some pressure from you also. Well done for getting away from the abuse and doing the best for your daughter and yourself so things can get better.

      Im sorry you are struggling. The world is a better place with you in it

      Lx

    • #43553
      Lisa
      Main Moderator

      Hi Eve,

      I just wanted to show you some support. I am so sorry that you are having such a stressful time. You are such a strong lady and you and such a comfort to so many women on this forum. Please reach out to some local support or phone the helpline. I also agree that perhaps getting some support for your daughter might help you to feel a bit less overwhelmed. I do understand that just getting through a day can feel like a marathon but you don’t have to do it alone. We are all here for you so please keep posting to let us know how you are.

      Best wishes,

      Lisa
      Forum Moderator

    • #43705
      Eve1
      Participant

      Thank you both. My daughter is getting some hel, which is good. I have found out when there’s a local drop in by WA but I haven’t managed to get there yet. I want to.

      Thank you Lisa, that’s encouraging to hear.

      xx

    • #43709
      bunsandcakes
      Participant

      Hi Eve1,

      You are not alone. I feel the same things you mention. I had a breakdown recently and its been hard to get past the ‘I cant do this’ feelings but WE CAN! We just do it! We carry on because we have kids who need us. We carry on because there were good times and there will be again. We carry on so it doesn’t beat us.

      Good luck, things WILL improve. x

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