- This topic has 24 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 3 years, 10 months ago by KIP..
-
AuthorPosts
-
-
13th June 2020 at 9:09 pm #106271Hellohellohello111Participant
Just had to call police as I’m being threatened hes saying if he gets kicked out of the house he will (detail removed by moderator) and he keeps saying he is going to tell everyone I’m a physco in court and that I should have been sectioned and my prescription drugs are making me loopy. Police could not arrest him as he as not yet been served the papers for the non molestation order. The police officer said next time he threatens me I am allowed to record it as long it is in the home and they can use it as evidence
-
14th June 2020 at 8:56 pm #106372iliketeaParticipant
Hi, hope you’re ok, sorry I think your post slipped down the pages. Do you have VoicePro? one of the lovely women on here recommended it to me and its really good and free. Stay strong. Just tell the truth, that is the best you can do, they will see the truth. Can you stop contact with him? Get a different mobile number for now until the court case.
x -
17th June 2020 at 2:49 am #106560Soulsearcher18Participant
Hi, just want to check in and see if you are ok HelloHellohello111- How’s everything going now?
Soulsearcher18
-
17th June 2020 at 9:34 pm #106655Hellohellohello111Participant
Hi I’m scared. The court papers were served (removed by moderator) and he is threatening me. I took out some credit cards in his name with his permission and he is saying that he will get me done for fraud
-
18th June 2020 at 10:10 am #106677diymum@1Participant
HHH this is so common these are all scare tactics to destabilise you. So you feel u can’t fight him. The reality is he has committed the offense not you. They always switch it around remember it’s gaslighting. Take a step back a breath, think logically about this what he is trying to say there is no proof. Go to see your gp and get all this down with him xx the gp cam back u in court it’s a professional opinion v his hear say xx my ex did the same it was all hot air – tactics xx
-
18th June 2020 at 11:08 am #106682Hellohellohello111Participant
I’m still scared. Will I get in trouble?
-
18th June 2020 at 11:26 am #106685diymum@1Participant
no sweetheart this is how he wants you to feel xx give your gp a ring and go in to see them tell them whats going on xx youll be fine its horrible x
-
18th June 2020 at 11:27 am #106686diymum@1Participant
my ex took stuff out in my name without consent and nothing happened xx so no
-
18th June 2020 at 2:12 pm #106695Hellohellohello111Participant
The hearing for the occupation order is (removed by moderator) and now he keeps threatening me saying I (removed by moderator). And apparently he is getting represented for free but not legal aid..is this possible?
-
18th June 2020 at 2:34 pm #106696diymum@1Participant
yeh he can self represent but if you have a lawyer its best. can your GP put something in writing for you ie how this is affecting you and what happened. These witnesses will be lying for him lots of folk wouldn’t be willing to do that and if its family it wont hold any water. can you get people to write statements about his behaviour that they’ve seen? xx
-
18th June 2020 at 2:35 pm #106697diymum@1Participant
get the police statement? do you have a womens aid worker? they could do a risk assessment. I know its not a lot of time to prepare x
-
18th June 2020 at 9:21 pm #106733Hellohellohello111Participant
Hi I know that he has filed (removed by moderator) statements against me. He has got (removed by moderator) to write statements to say I have been violent toward him. I dont think I will get the occupation order now.
-
18th June 2020 at 9:22 pm #106734Hellohellohello111Participant
He is also saying his solicitor will represent him (removed by moderator)
-
18th June 2020 at 9:49 pm #106737Wants To HelpParticipant
Are you actually having conversations with him to know this information or are you getting it via someone else? Is the Non Mol Order in place with you living in the same household?
Do not get sucked in to what he is telling you. This is leaving you feel defeated already and it sounds like your belief in his words is making you think that it’s not worth the bother to go ahead because you’ve already lost.
The people may not have made statements, he may not have a solicitor acting pro bono for him. On the other hand, it may be true, but until you go to court yourself and apply for the OO you will never know. Do not throw the towel in now. That is what he is hoping you will do, so if you do, you are playing right in to his hands. The ball is in your court at the moment as you have been awarded a Non Mol. Therefore, the court has believed your evidence so far. He’s on the backfoot so is giving you all sorts of stories to try and get you to give in and give up.
Try and ignore him and carry on doing your own thing. Don’t let him know that this has riled you and knocked your confidence. If you do not go ahead with this you’ll kick yourself further down the line for not trying, you’ll always wonder whether you would have got it or not.
-
18th June 2020 at 10:06 pm #106739Hellohellohello111Participant
Thanks. The non mol is in place whilst we are living together. He has got (removed by moderator) to write a statement I know this is true because I asked them. The (removed by moderator) is being manipulated by him and has been doing everything he asks him to for a long time. I dont know what to do?? Apparently I (removed by moderator) him and (removed by moderator). I’m not sure whe this was supposed to be and there were no police calls. Is he just trying to abuse the process?? I cant cope with this anymore. Apparently I am a physco and I dont deserve my children. He keeps using my mental health against me. I am paying for this privately aswell
-
18th June 2020 at 10:16 pm #106740KIP.Participant
Not sure what the terms are of the non mol but it sounds like he’s breaking them? Do you have a power of arrest attached? Did you try for an occupation order to have him removed? Can’t understand how he was allowed to stay under the same roof and yes he’s building a case to probably have you removed from the property by getting someone to lie in a statement.
-
18th June 2020 at 10:17 pm #106741KIP.Participant
Get some support from women’s aid and Rights of Women, they offer free legal advice online.
-
18th June 2020 at 10:28 pm #106746Hellohellohello111Participant
Yes I have been recording him and showing the police but it is not enough to have him arrested. I cant cope I am just going to move out tomorrow and start again. I will loose everything
-
18th June 2020 at 10:38 pm #106749KIP.Participant
Can you stay with friends or family at least till you consider your next move? Is it a joint tenancy or mortgage?
-
18th June 2020 at 10:45 pm #106751Hellohellohello111Participant
Got nowhere to go and it’s a joint tenancy but I pay all the Bill’s. I was going to go to refuge 2 days ago but I turned it down. I cant pay rent on 2 places
-
18th June 2020 at 10:55 pm #106752KIP.Participant
There are new domestic abuse laws where the perpetrator can be removed from the tenancy for abuse. Have you spoken to the landlord? If you pay all the bills then he won’t want your partner living there and may remove his name?
-
18th June 2020 at 10:58 pm #106754KIP.Participant
Landlords also have a responsibility when it comes to domestic abuse. Why didn’t the non molestation order include him leaving the property?
-
18th June 2020 at 11:16 pm #106755Hellohellohello111Participant
I have no idea why it didnt include that. Landlord not helping me as they said they have to act on the tenancy as a whole so if he gets evicted then i will also. They are not helping me at all. I am stuck now what do I do
-
18th June 2020 at 11:28 pm #106757KIP.Participant
Do you have someone from women’s aid helping you? The landlord has a duty of care. If you can afford to rent somewhere else can you leave. Phone citizens advice and they can give you more information. the council have a duty to rehome victims too. Your local women’s aid should be able to help you with all this and guide you on a non molestation order or occupation order to have him removed, you definitely need help with this from women’s aid.
-
18th June 2020 at 11:29 pm #106758KIP.Participant
There’s a national domestic abuse helpline that’s 24 hours if you can ring them too for advice.
-
-
AuthorPosts
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.