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    • #151236
      Winter2022
      Participant

      This week has been the most intense of my entire relationship with him. I’m so close – I have all my stuff packed and in the process of looking for a place but I feel that last little step of moving out the hardest and I would love some words of encouragement/support. I want this weight off my shoulders but I just feel so sick as I’ve relied on him so much. It’s been a long term relationship and I have been so attached to him. Why can’t I just do the last step…I know it’s hard and I’ve been trying to make it more real in my head and life by telling a few people we are breaking up but I haven’t come to tell my family yet as I think that will be too real.

    • #151247
      Lisa
      Main Moderator

      Hi Winter2022,

      This is a very crucial point in time for you. It sounds like you have made a safety plan for leaving and while that demonstrates that you have been very strong and focused in all this, understandably you are reaching out for some encouragement.

      Remember you are doing the right thing and what all it has taken for you to get to this point. It’s completely normal and expected that you are going through some very complicated emotions right now. You may be feeling anxiety about leaving the long-term relationship, but remember that it wasn’t a healthy one. Take things steady and in your own pace. Tell those who you feel comfortable telling right now. Prioritise your needs and what you feel is the right thing to do.

      I’m sure I speak for so many others here on this forum when I say you are not alone in this. If it helps at all, do talk all this over with your local domestic abuse service too, as they can just reassure you and go over any concerns you may have as you move forward.

      Know that your journey doesn’t end as soon as you leave and get your own place. You will need time to heal and to process all that has happened. Express your needs to the domestic abuse service local to you, as they often have emotional/psychological support available in some form or can refer you.

      Keep posting to let us know how you get on.

      All the best,

      Lisa

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