Life after leaving a stalking ex/ fleeing dv

[DustySwan]

Hello everyone. I hope your all ok 🙂
I am new here and am seeking some advice about how to move on emotionally and physically after leaving an abusive ex. A bit of backstory for you. I have just moved into a new home after (detail removed by Moderator) months of struggle to get help to move so I am no longer in a place of crisis, but I am really struggling emotionally and physically. My ex partner has (detail removed by Moderator) come out of prison which in itself very overwhelming but I am finding it hard at the moment feeling very lost having to up and completely start again. I feel like I’ve lost myself completely. I am not depressed I am thankful I have left I just don’t really know who I am anymore or what to do with myself or how to move on in life especially after being stalked and my non molestation order I had against him being broken so many times I feel like I have no trust in people either.
It’s the oddest feeling, being so greatful to be free but also just being completely lost at the same time.

If anyone has any advice on how to start a new life and completely moving on after leaving a horrendous ex partner I would be very grateful for any advice / even new people to speak to at the moment who can understand what it’s like.

Thanks in advance and I hope you all have a lovely week ❤️

[Allornothing]

Hi DustySwan, I am unable to advise as I am in a similar situation to you. I know it’s going to be a very very long journey. I am putting myself forward for as many online (female only) courses so I can just to try and meet new people, but my world literally revolves around my current situation and I have nothing else to talk about! I am still living relatively close and bump into people and feel like I have to defend myself and wonder if I need to consider moving away. It is around every corner I turn, I can’t attend anything face to face as I think he is putting himself out there in the hope of bumping into me. He has broken bail conditions, police have done nothing. But I like you just don’t know how to start again, it literally wrecks my head 🙁

We deserve a fresh start, sometimes I feel happy and free and then something happens and I feel like someone is sitting on my chest and can’t see a way out.

I bumped into someone I knew yesterday and I have not stopped agonising over it. It was someone in a similar situation to me but a male and I have literally torn the conversation apart in trying to figure out what is truth and what is lies. The trust I used to have is shattered and I used to think I was a good judge of character but now think I was a people pleaser, but I really don’t want to change who I am but feel I am going to become such a difficult version of myself.

But…. all that being said, I do believe we will get there. It is going to take a long time but we have to believe that we are good people and have qualities that people will see and want to be friends (that sounds a bit desperate!) but you know what I mean!

If anything and I know this was of no help, but at least knowing we aren’t the only one’s feeling like this helps a little. Sending lots of love xx

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