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    • #48151
      Falling Skys

      I was hoping that because of it taking so long to get free of him, all my ups and downs would be finished.

      But sadly not to be.

      My bank accounts have been transfer to my abusers new address, I have got them changed back, now the bank is seeing if it was him or a bank error.

      My mother is very ill and I cant copy with her (which makes me feel guilty).

      The house needs more work than I expected I’ve had a builder round to give me prices so I can go from there, I thought he was good at DIY but instead he was a boger.

      I know I will get there in the end but it seems so hard at the moment.

    • #48154

      Big hugs, FS.

      I felt like you a couple of weeks ago. With a horrible situation, I felt propelled back into victim mode.

      But as KIP always says, it will pass. Sometimes you will feel really down. Don’t feel ashamed of it, embrace it and think about what it’s telling you. Your feelings are telling you something. Do you need more medical intervention for your mum? Do you need more rest and times when you just ‘do nothing’ and simply be?

      As for the dodgy builder, unfortunately there’s plenty of them. Is there anyone else who acquaintances can recommend?

      We can only achieve certain things. We can’t try to do it all, else we get burn out. We need to pace ourselves.


    • #48167
      Falling Skys

      Thanks Serenity x

      Mum is having tests done its just shocking to she her so weak. I wouldn’t be surprised if the medication is making her ill but its catch 22 the she needs the medication for the pain etc.

      I have the details of two good builders so i will get put right what my ex has done.

      Your right about me trying to do it all. I want to get the house clean and up together so i can move on. I have one more area to sort and then bring things back that I have at my mums. But i will just do a b9x at a time.

      But i will pace my self or i will burn myself out and I cant afford to do that. Next weekend i will make it a me weekend.

      I was thinking of renting out a room but I don’t think could cope with that at the moment. Get an estate agent round to advice me what I need to get done to put it back on the market for the best price.


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