Manipulating child

[Put the kettle on]

How do I protect my child from all the lies and manipulating during contact with ex/ex family? I feel like nobody understands

[KIP.]

Talk to women’s aid and the NSPCC have a helpline, there is a good book by Lundy Bancroft, When Daddy Hurts Mummy. But I would empower my children with knowledge. Not sure what age they are. Be truthful and consistent. Let them know that abuse and lies are unacceptable. That they need to be open and honest with you. No secrets. Women’s aid run a course for children of abusers so that’s a good place to start. I understand. I’ve been there and it’s horrendous. I tried to protect my child when I should have empowered him x

[Put the kettle on]

Thanks kip, I have previously spoken to nspcc and they couldn’t offer me advice as I was told they only speak to the child. I like that perspective of empowering my child and would be interested in any advice on this. I didn’t know there were courses for children that sounds a great idea.

[KIP.]

The Freedom Programme is for women and there is a new course for children of abusers. I will see if I can find the details. If you google Lundy Bancroft there may be books he’s written in the subject. Evan Stark is also another good source of reference and hopefully your local women’s aid can help with all this x don’t give up. If your child can’t go zero contact with him then you can. Use a third party for contact. Let your child see that you have the power to go zero contact with abusers. To cut them out your life. Set an example. If you don’t have to have contact, they will see it as normal and know they can do the same without feeling guilty if the become victims too.

[KIP.]

Youngminds.org

Found this but if you contact women’s aid they will be able to help. There also the domestic abuse helpline x

[Author]

Posts