Missing them

[Happybelle]

This guy has caused me the worst personal and financial distress I’ve ever experienced and yet somehow now he’s gone I miss him! What’s that about!
One of the last interactions with him he was so verbally intimidating that the muscles in my legs were spasming uncontrollably. Totally unacceptable behaviour, totally wrong and I will never go back there and yet I’m still getting the feeling of missing him. Absolutely bizaar.
Anyone else had that or maybe just a normal part of finishing a relationship with someone even though it was abusive.

[Bananaboat]

Oh yes, pesky brain. I’ll never go back there but yes, there are days I miss him. Often it’s not him necessarily I miss but ‘someone’ to share something with and obviously he was the last person I cared for so my mind thinks of him. I think it’s normal and it does fade. Tomorrow or the day after you’ll hate it again, it’s a rollercoaster for the mind & soul 🙂 x

[seakinghelp2]

I feel exactly this way too and I don’t understand why. I miss him terribly and struggle so much not hearing from him, yet for so long I wanted to escape his abuse I just don’t understand it

[Happybelle]

Strange isn’t it? Even now, a few weeks on from this I crave him even worse!!

[Broadbodiedchaser]

This is all a result of our experiences of love-bombing and trauma bonding. There’s a lot of information online which I used to help me deal with symptoms of ‘missing’ my ex and guilt over leaving. It about the comfort we get from what is familiar to us, however upsetting this might have been. Keep a diary to refer back to. It happens less frequently with time but, several years on I still experience this.

[Bluebirds]

This is what I’m currently experiencing. I’ve been unhappy for so long. I’m also touching fully being out of my relationship but I’m having overwhelming sadness and miss him. It was my choice to end it he’s been begging but I haven’t give in. Now he seems to of accepted it and things are moving. I’m fighting everything right now to not go home. Just have a hug watch tv. Sounds so silly!! Absolutely draining me!!

[Freshbluerose]

At some point it happens to many of us. Whenever I feel that I miss him I am going back to my journals. I am reading what he did to me and to my child. Some times when we are emotional we are forgetting the bad moments but unfraternally they are there.  Its my loneliness that makes me to miss him because actually there is nothing good to miss from him. But its better to be alone with my grievances rather than suffering again and again and again because of an abusive partner. For many years I was walking in an endless dark tunnel. Since I left him, I am not goanna lie, its difficult to set up a new life, healthy life, I am again in a dark tunnel but this time its not endless, I can see light at the end. And every day  I am going closer to the light.
I will never go back for any reason. No way!

 

[Happybelle]

Absolutely right there Freshblierose definitely better to be alone than where I was.

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