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No one has replied yet…I only have the following to offer…
When I went to refuge it was one of the first questions they asked (the support worker)
I understand that the quality of the support workers varies from place to place that’s true,
with me it wasn’t the case that my name was on the mortgage although my financial situation was bad enough then due to financial abuse and manipulation.
I recall going to the CAB/solicitor with them to see what could be done.
It might be worth looking on the CAB advice guide under ‘domestic abuse and mortgage’ to see what is there…
I am pretty sure it will be a case of getting yourself out first to safety (or indeed getting him out)
as a priority and then tackling the rest
sorry not to be of more help good luck
ftc
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Hi I don’t know
I don’t know enough of your situation to give clear advice as don’t know how bad the violence is and how dangerous your situation was.I have been out and divorced several years now. My ex didn’t get violent until towards end. I was terrified and he was trying to throw us out of the house was was a mortgaged property with both our names. I told him it had to be sold as he said he wanted out of marriage. He tried to bully me and child put and upped his abuse. I went to go in terror. The gp told him he had to move out or she would involve social services sue to concerns over our safety. As I was then living in the house he agreed to sell house.
I got a rubbish solicitor and the one bit of advice I would give you is go to as,get a case worker and absolutely get a referral for solicitor from wa. They give a free half hour if you have no money. Start documenting all abuse. Call police, go to gp. Get a secret bank account and start saving every penny you can. Sell stuff in the quiet. Collect important documents or get copies.hide clothes for you and kids and hide them at someone’s house.
My ex was very financially abusive and I was trying to find out what he was doing financially. You can separate yourself financially with credit block and block on credit checking websites to be notified and having a block on anyone taking credit out in your name.
Start small and prepare any tiny things to help. See if you can get an occupation order because of his violent behaviour and a restraining order. Speak to solicitor.
In my opinion and my position I needed the house sold as he had remortgage house so much I could not have paid mortgage or remortgage house to pay him off. Selling it and splitting equity so we could start again.
It meant he would never have any rights over our home legally or otherwise. We put a significant marker on our home so if he came near us or our home I could call the police and they would be there in 2 mins.
Sorry I can’t give more. Whatever it costs you it’s worth a million to be free. That said get what you can. You have rights financially because you will want it to start again.
Don t expect child support. Abusers never pay. Still worth it to get rid of them xxxx
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Difficult. If it’s joint names you are both liable for it.
I agree CAB Rights of Wonen and use your free 30 mins solicitor advice.
I was in that position and it was all sorted through (Detail removed by Moderator). It was complex. (Detail removed by Moderator) he’s still faffing over his bit but did eventually take the mortgage on as he’d told me to get out of his castle so he bore the consequences!
If you live there and have children and he’s moved out then its “family home” and depending on income he might have to pay so you and children can live there till 16/18 when likelihood is it will be sold.
You can “buy him out” he could “buy you out” or you coukd sell pay off what’s owing and split profit after sale costs.
Your building society can opt to give you “mortgage break” if things are tough financially and will advise on other things – worth a visit but bear in mind you might not be able to go alone as its joint mortgage.
My advice us chat to local CAB and women’s aid phone rights of women and try to get a solicitor who understands DA local WA may advise on a good one mine did. Theres a lot of info on divorce websites too.
Be prepared to be bamboozled by him. Get some facts from experts and stick to your guns. Deep breaths too – it takes time xx -
Hey,
It depends on what you want to do with the house / mortgsge. Every situation is different do it’s best to see a solicitor. Some offer 30 mins or an hour for free with basic advice. Just call lots until you find a free initial advice. I have seen several and felt like I had a good idea of my options (all giving tips and when added I felt I had a good picture of the situation).
You can also call right of women but it’s tricky to get them, in my experience CAB didn’t know anything but I found a list of solicitors on their website and some had the free initial advice.
I can discuss with you privately if you like and maybe I have some answers for you if you have a similar situation. Feel free to message me x
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