I find today a very difficult day. A confusing day. I should havd a child but i dont as i miscaraged. Yes it would been my fathers child and that could been really difficult but it wouldnt been the childs fault. I was still technically a child/teen.how i survived i dont know.
Then theres the confusion of that my own mother didnt protect me from my father. And a sense of anger at her. We havent spoken about my abuse in many years. She in denial. It hirts.