my dad

[unsinkableunicorn]

Hi, im new here so im not too sure how this works. im (detail removed by moderator) and have been facing abuse from my father all my life. im moving to university soon so am moving away from home. i think i almost accepted the abuse for a long time, until i met some people in my life who supported me and educated me. im now in a tricky situation of being trapped in a toxic house while attempting to navigate my way round all the lies ive believed for years. it feels strange to suddenly have to relearn things such as rights, finances and just regular life processes that that have been manipulated and controlled. i just want some support as i attempt to escape and gain independence. the physical and emotional abuse and control has had a shocking impact on my mental health and i feel so scared of the world. everything seems confusing when you have received mixed messages and have been made to feel afraid constantly. i feel like im going to ‘independent life’ as an alien as everything has changed. my dad will still have some control over my finances but i am actively attempting to cut off ties with him in every way. how do you escape something you were born into?

[Darcy]

Hi Beautiful Angel,
Welcome to the forum and well done for posting … it’s a great start in acknowledging what is going on and starting to move forward.
It is great that you are going to university and this will get you away from your Dad, however I understand how scary the world must look after being abused and controlled all your life.
I would really urge you to do some real self care, this is important now but also so you don’t end up in a relationship like the one you have with your Dad. Sometimes we are drawn to what we are use to or what we know, even if it’s not healthy for us.
Do some research on abuse, and the cycle of abuse, this will give you a clearer understanding of what has gone on and that it isn’t your fault.
I also recommend reading or listening to Louise Hay, You Can Heal Your Life for a good does of self love. She was actually abused as a child, so her story is very inspiring and she gives loads of self love techniques.
Use this forum for support, the wonderful ladies on here have lots of great advice and are here to help.
Know that you are not alone
Stay connected and keep posting
Sending you continued love and support
Darcy xx

[unsinkableunicorn]

thank you so much! that is so lovely and i hugely appreciate it
i will have a look into her work and i will definitely do my research – thank you again 🙂

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