My life gets even worth, I feel alone

[Takeaction]

I left him a year ago, and I am really struggling with my life, I got four small children, iam homeless,and I don’t get any support from women aids only they just applied for me housing application and after that they closed my case,while I was the most difficult situation. Now iam living a hell life… one hostal room, and I don’t see any hope that iam moving there, next year or two years may be pleased give me any things I can do….. the housing system doesn’t work who needs most they just put you on waiting lists that’s.. I feel I don’t belong to this world… my lack is bad iam nothing… me and my children we dont have…… anyone no life, no family no friends, no things…

[Anonymous]

I’m so sorry you going through this. Just wanted to send some support. Go to your doctor to get a letter to send to housing this will make you a higher priority, just say the whole housing situation is getting you really down which it is. Get letters from children school, and any health professionals you can to send to housing this will help. You could write your local MP as well. I’ve been in a hostel and I know how unpleasant it is but it is better than being in an abusive relationship- there is an end in sight things will improve. Sending love and hugs xx

[Lisa]

Hi Takeaction,

I’m very sorry to hear you have not been supported adequately by the very services you are told are there to help you. Do you feel it’s an option to go back to your local domestic abuse service to tell them how detrimental living this way for a year has been on you and your children? Ask if they can press to housing again, to help make them see you as priority need. Do not feel you are asking too much with this, as your local domestic abuse service is there to give on-going support should you need it.
Have you been presented with the option of going into a refuge with your children? Your local domestic abuse service can do searches for vacancies if you ask. A refuge is a safe house which offers temporary accommodation for women and their children. There are refuges throughout the UK which provide a place of safety for any woman who needs to escape abuse, married or single, with or without children. There is a full breakdown of refuge accommodation along with frequently asked questions here: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/the-survivors-handbook/what-is-a-refuge-and-how-can-i-stay-in-one/
You could contact Shelter line to discuss your rights. Shelter line offer free and confidential housing information, support and legal advice on all housing and homelessness issues. Shelter line are available on 0808 800 44 44 (8am – 8pm, 7 days a week). The website is available at http://www.england.shelter.org.uk.
Do keep posting here to let us know how you get on.
Take care,

Lisa

[cakepops]

Sometimes DV services have different types of support. When I was trying to leave the relationship I was helped by the women’s service locally. Then this ended and I was moved over to the family outreach team for longer term support, as there are ongoing issues due to family court etc. That’s been in place for a long time now. I have had a bit less regular support recently, as I think these services are all inundated due to covid.

If you no longer have contact with your abuser, you might need to seek help via other local support. Can you ask your health visitor what other services are available locally for families? There might be something like home start locally, or similar.

[Author]

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