My life seems ridiculous

[Eve1]

I’m supposed to have counseling today but, my daughter had a panic attack this morning and came home. I really wanted to her to go back in to school, and she agreed to try. She told me on the way how much she hates the teacher she’s got next, he used to be nice but now only liked the’popular girls’, I.e. Not her and shouts and is horrible. I told her she was going for her, not him and asked her to please try. She got into school but rang me crying. Eventually I persuaded her to go to reception and I would ring them and come and get her. I rang them and started to say explain that we’d just list grandma and got upset myself! This is not even why my daughter is upset, she can’t say what it is. The receptionist me to go and get a drink and they would sit with her for a bit, do that’s where I am!
I’ve spent 2 afternoons with my Dad this week, he is finding difficult, obviously, and I’m the supportive daughter to all intents and purposes and will do what I can until the funeral at least, but I am so aware of abuse and n********m, and of what mum and dad’s relationship red actually like, it’s killing me to just sit by and listen to his rubbish.
I really wanted to go to counseling to vent a bit of at least talk about what it’s really like.

Needs to vent

xx

[SaharaD]

Not ridiculous at all. I remember many meltdowns at secondary school. Mine and some of the other girls in the same year. Mine was illness and my father had to leave work to come and get me. (seeing as he was the less caring of the two parents, I only did it if I was desperate.) Another time, I had been bitten by an insect my hand double in size and I just got really stressed and had a rant at 6 am in the morning and my mother said I think you better stay home. She cancelled work. me falling and twisting my ankle. There were girls with allergic reactions, girls with anxiety attacks, girl estranged from their parents so would refuse to go home.

It’s called being a parent. Got to make sure they are ok and then look after yourself so you can always be there for them.

Don’t be hard on yourself. Sometimes bereavement and abuse just churn everything up. it’s natural to feel this way.

Vent, Rant, shout, cry on here as much as you want. We will do our best until your next counselling session.

[Serenity]

Your life isn’t ridiculous. Unfortunately, abuse and difficult circumstances cause chaos at different times.

There were times over the past couple of years where I turned up my sons’ schools, tearful in the school office ( me, that is) ; my eldest was being warned by them over things- it was a nightmare.

Don’t feel embarrassed. In fact, I would advise being truthful with a member of the teaching staff who you trust. It’s better to be open and get the help you need.

You’re doing so well, despite all you’ve been through these past few weeks. It must be hard trying to be dutiful to a father whose abuse is transparent. Whilst it’s understandable that you feel you need to be there for him at present, don’t let him pull you in in the future through guilt.

These next few weeks will be hard for you, but we’re all here for you x

[Author]

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