My miscarriage is not convenient

[Rainbowcloud]

I’m having a missed MC he worn accept it didn’t come the hospital with me last week when they said no HB for baby. I’m back (detail removed by moderator) for a scan as they have to do two by law then I’m taking pills to end it. I feel relief I don’t have to have another baby with him.
(detail removed by moderator) I said well I will probably have the pills then I need u here. He went off on a rant that he needs the money for Xmas and let’s see what happens a HB might be there (detail removed by moderator)
I feel guilty that I’m miscarrying cos I’m inconvenient and ruining plans.
He hasn’t asked once if I’m ok just that I think the worst and am a drama queen.
He don’t help pay for little girl we have so I will struggle again and will never be in this position again thankfully.
I won’t let that happen but even now he thinks only of him not me and what I’m facing at Christmas.
Sorry jsur need a vent to people who get it x

[little-miss-sunshine]

Hi Rainbowcloud,

I’m so sorry this has happened to you, and that you aren’t getting any support. Have you got any family or friends that could help? Don’t feel guilty it’s not your fault at all.

I’ve not long got out and my (emotionally abusive) ex wanted kids but luckily it never happened (not for lack of trying on his part) it was hard enough without kids, so I can’t imagine how hard it is for you.

Keep posting, all the ladies on here are incredibly supportive and have helped me so much. Have you contacted Womens aid? I used the text chat first and then called. They were really lovely and helpful.

All the love to you x*x

[Rainbowcloud]

Thankyou I’m on school run now I’ve left early so I can escape. Sometimes he isn’t abusive for a while and I think I’m safe but as soon as something he doesn’t like pops up the abuse begins again. I have a few friends I’ve told who have offered to have the kids for me if I need them to on the weekend. We have one daughter together who is (detail removed by moderator) tbh I was going to have a termination with her I am so glad I didn’t as she has bought me much joy and happiness to my life and I don’t regret it for a second jusf wish it was with someone who had more compassion and less selfish ways.
I haven’t posted for a while as I post then don’t leave as I feel to scared to leave and not have my daughter all the time because I don’t want his influence on her without me there if you know what I mean.
I hate the thought of him having her on weekends etc he had access to his older kids so would defo fight me for it.
She’s my world and I don’t want to lose her or have him bad mouth me to her.
I think sometimes he’s being nice and he does the odd nice thoughtful thing but the abuse always starts now I’m getting silent treatment.
I hate I’m still feeling pregnant and carrying this round with me it’s a really horrible feeling he doesn’t get it.
(detail removed by moderator) he blames me for anything that goes wrong. Now he’s shouting at me because this miscarriage isn’t a good time for him he has to work. Pleads poverty but has money I’m not stupid he isn’t skint like a normal skint.
I jsur know when I have to go through the process of losing this baby he will prob fake an interest but won’t care really.
He seems angry I’ve lost the baby like I’ve caused it it’s hard to explain but angry all the time.
Just want (detail removed by moderator) so they can check again and I can start the process and hopefully be over it for Xmas day for the kids.
He always shouts at me and puts me down it’s depressing my life is depressing.

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