Need a hand hold

[Headspin]

I’ve been talking to a man for a few (detail removed by Moderator) now on line. He is who he says he is, I have done my research on him and he’s kosher. The messages were becoming more and more intense and he was saying the nicest things to me, words that I’ve never had from my abusive husband. I’m ashamed to say that I know this man is married and I became totally fixated on him, checking my emails regularly to see if he had sent a message. I didn’t chase him, because I didn’t want to appear needy. In fact I’ve been unable to concentrate on anything properly, just keep fantasizing about him and totally fixated on him. In my head, I’m living with him, we’re happy and my life is rosy. I know this to be madness, the more I speak to him, the more I resent my husband, the lack of intimacy and no sex life. The man said (detail removed by Moderator) I sent him an angry message telling him to leave me alone. Then regretted it and apologised, we’ve now decided to leave the messages to just (detail removed by Moderator). We’re meeting when I have to go to (detail removed by Moderator) for a pre arranged trip. Part of me was delighted to be speaking to someone that my husband knew nothing about it and it was payback, part of me is ashamed because he’s married, part of me wants him badly, the rest of me is totally devastated and I just don’t know how to handle it. If you’ve read this far thank you.

[Put the kettle on]

I can understand that you are enjoying the time and attention from this man when you are struggling so much with your own situation, I wouldn’t encourage it though. If the married man is talking to you behind his wifes back what’s to say he won’t do the same to you if you got into a relationship? Many of these men take advantage of our vulnerability and many don’t leave their wives, they want their cake and to eat it. You deserve better than to be someone’s bit on the side. I would suggest you end things as hard as it is and focus on you

[Hazydayz]

👍 I agree

[Hazydayz]

🤝 Hope your having a better day? feeling stronger today💞

[Headspin]

Thank you all, just needed to get things into perspective, I think post abuse it’s so hard to know what’s being said is true and what isn’t. We have decided to stop contact for a while, get my head together. I can’t be in a situation where I’m fretting about whether or not he’s contacted me.

[Hazydayz]

👍 So true!

[Author]

Posts