Need to have intimacy tonight

[Mom of two]

validate my nerves and anxiety towards having love and sex tonight! having a hard time working up the excitement of being told I LOVE YOU when I know he clearly doesn’t

[Lisa]

Hello Momoftwo,

You should never feel required or forced to be intimate with someone if you feel anxious, nervous or have reservations. If you are feeling pressured, the feelings you’re describing may be a normal response.

I hope you are doing okay today.

Take care and keep posting,
Lisa

[Buildmeupbuttercup]

Dear Momoftwo,

I felt obligated to have sex with my ex because of the things he said and did. He always told me he loved me and I fully believed it (not so much anymore). It was and still is hard to label it as sexual abuse because I love him and also because I’ve been physically forced into sex by other men, so the coercion and more minor sexual assaults from my ex seemed less ‘serious’ in comparison.

However, the impact my ex had on me was similar to the impact my rapists had on me. It was wrong and it hurts. I used to feel broken and ashamed that I didn’t want to have sex with him, even though he would physically and emotionally hurt me during sex.

I don’t know your situation so I don’t know if it is safe for you to stand up for yourself, but I hope that in your heart you know that he is abusive and you’ve done nothing to deserve that abuse. You are not alone and we are here for you.

Big hugs and best wishes xx

[Author]

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