Need to stay strong

[Falling Skys]

Its coming to an end and I need to hold it together but its getting harder.

I was hoping that he would be gone by now but his solicitor is holding onto paperwork. ( Now have both of mine chasing them)

All I can do is watch him and our son box up or damage what he’s not taking.

I have written a mantra

“I give him permission to take my belonging,
I can mend what he damage
I can replace what he breaks or takes”

As you ladies have said in the past it get worse when they know their control is nearing the end.

[Confused123]

hey hun

so proud of you , u r doing so well, you are so much closer to freedom , you have got this far, after all that pain you got the house sold, continue the no reaction game, they have already hurt u loads, they cant touch u no more

[Falling Skys]

Thank you Con123 for your words, it gives me the strength to keep holding my head high through this.

FS x

[Confused123]

hey hun

hope u feeling stronger today, keep posting on here when u r feeling low , u really are doing well , let them keep showing attidue, u just smile to yourself in private knowing u have won cause they are perm leaving your life

[Falling Skys]

Hi con123

Im positive about my future just tired of their constant negativity. Just bitting at the bit to move on.

I have done a couple of positives this week. Removed a sticker from the back of my car that promoted their hobbie. WD40 and a window scrapper loll who needs a man when you can Google 😆

Also bought pink kitchen roll lol silly i know bit it makes me smile 😚

[KIP.]

That’s great. You can start to buy little things. Cut out pictures from magazines of wall paper etc that you like. Keep a scrap book and look forward to having your own safe place. I’m still in the marital home. It’s taken me a couple years to get over the trauma bond I felt here. I was bonded to my home, the same way I was to him. But I needed this time to come to terms with that. My psychologist kept telling me to move but I just wasn’t ready. I can feel that bond breaking now and am looking to sell. But I did it at my pace. Hang in there. Just be very safety conscious. Push for an actual date for him to move out legally binding x then move out a week or two before. It’s going to get worse x

[Falling Skys]

Hi KIP

Thanks for your words and if i can i will spend some time away once i have a leaving date. I was going to have the day off when they are leaving now im thinking i will go to work. Then go home with a friend and see whats left so he get no feed back from my reactions.

When I found out i could afford to buy him out. I spent two days walking round it seeing i could be happy tgere. I can to the decision i was fine with the house and it him tbat i need red off.

Though i do think it will be a case of me doing up and then downsizing.

I have some many things to prove to myself 😊

[lover of no contact]

Hi Falling Skys,

Just want to say you have done and are doing fantastic. You have the control here. Let him do what he likes with your stuff, he only wants the raction and you’re not giving it to him. You’re holding your head up high. I love your mantra. Its a good way to look at it. I remember when you first posted. You were very stuck in the cycle of abuse with him. I remember there seemed no way out. But you did it! You’re getting him out. With lots of patience and perseverance and taking small steps to get out of the abusive relationship, you did it! You’re nearly there. You won’t be able to believe the peace of mind in not having to live with an abuser.

Keep going. Keep posting. Him and his abuse are nearly gone from your life.

[Falling Skys]

Thank you LONC, I was like a rabbit caught in the head lights everything I did he blocked. I have come a long way and I will be free. I can’t imagine what it will be like without being on high alert, it will be so so good.:D

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