New baby

[Shelly123]

Hi ladies not been on but had my lil baby. Babys dad and I were getting on i let him back into my life as i felt he needed a bond with the baby. Well he has been horrid today and called me all the names under the sun. Said im playing games and slammed all the doors and went outside ranting and raving kicking everything over in his path. How do i get an injunction? I cannot go on like this baby isnt even (detail removed by moderator) months old and this is what im dealing with. I know he will turn up at my house everyday i just dont know what to do.

[Confused123]

Hey Sweetie

I think you can get a non mol issued against him so he cant approach u, call the help line on this site and get them to guide u,your rigfht they dontchange no matter how many chances we give them, praise yourself for recognising the ssign at this early satge, u and childd eserve to live a peaceful life, make sure u have support around u, i never knew when i was with my abuser but u can actually call the police for advice and they refer the safe guard sing team to u adn refer the right contact of agencies that can support and guide u, dont fall for his apologies if he comes tommrow, go no contact if u cna ,bloch him on your phone, can anyone come and stay with u or could u go to your family for a while

[Shelly123]

Thank you im going to speak with the health visior and ask about that. The abuse is to much and switching it round on me is not good. 8 feel stronger now the baby is here but i also feel more emotional. I forgave him for a lot of stuff but i feel like this is the final straw

[Confused123]

HI sweetie

Hope u got the support u needed, u will find when we have baby we are so emotional and vunerable, partly why they chooses to up the abuse to make us weaker, please continue psoting the ladies on here are brill

[older lady]

Hello Shelly123, hope birth was okay. You are being very fair all round but you don’t need to help him have his ‘bond’, that’s for him to do by the efforts he makes. You need to keep you and baby safe. That’s what I had to do and I have not regretted it. You can’t help him. Sorry. Xx

[Anon123]

I would be careful how much contact and avoid unsupervised access you give him to your little one. I don’t want to worry you but I feel you should know that if its what the baby is used to then once they are able to leave you
e.g. On a bottle
then court cases can be 50% of time with each parent.
Obviously you wouldn’t trust him alone with your little one and I know it’s awfully hard on your own. I know there are organisations who can help you when you’ve got a small child but I can’t remember their name -basically they come to the house and play with your little one so you can catch up on chores or help with light housework /ironing or just to sit and have a chat. When I remember I will let you know.
Best of luck -remember to write everything down when you get a chance so it will be easier when you apply for your non molestation, I had to do mine in such I rush I hardly remembered much.

[Anon123]

Continued -I remembered !
They are called Home start, they have a website and loads of places round the uk.
I would suggest their one to one support would suit you best especially as they have as per their website people who are trained to help those leaving an abusive relationship.
Their groups are excellent too and they let you go for a coffee and they mind the children for a short time which when you never get a break is lovely although I would suggest you ask for the person coming over to you.
It’s also free.
Sure start centres can also be a help too.
I wish I had known this when mine were little. I would get all the help you can as then things will be easier in the long term. Let us know how you get on.

[Shelly123]

Thank you just read all messages. I have cut contact and i have a lot of family support. Im currently documenting everything. Its true the hormones are still going things that wouldnt normally bother me are bothering me. Thanks for your messages ladies x

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