New to this site and need some advice

[Happiness2020]

I am new to this site and need some advice. I have been in an abusive relationship that i do know but i am finding it really difficult to stay strong and not blame myself.
I was called names, not allowed to see anyone,hit, grabbed, spat on, subject to financial control and lots of other things. I feel so low about myself because of all what has been said to me that i feel as if this is all i deserve. I was told it is my fault as i did not give enough attention and love and i just feel so upset and low about myself that i do not know what to do to try and overcome this. I don’t want to keep feeling this way that i go back because i think it is my fault even though i did not do anything to him i still feel this way.

[Lisa]

Hi Happiness2020,

Thank you for sharing with us and welcome to the forum. It is common for abusers to blame the other person for the abuse but the only person responsible for the abuse is the abuser. You did nothing to cause the abuse and you did not deserve to be treated that way. I hope you find the forum a supportive place to be with others who understand how you are feeling and can offer you support from their own experiences.

If you feel like you are in need of some additional support, you could chat to a Women’s Aid worker in confidence via our Live Chat service (weekdays 10am – 4pm and 10am – 12pm weekends). They won’t tell you what to do, but can discuss your situation and signpost you to other support that’s relevant for you. You can access the chat service here: https://chat.womensaid.org.uk/

Do keep posting to let us know how you’re getting on.

Best wishes,

Lisa

[Author]

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