Newbie trying to get her life back on track!

[Queen13]

Hi ladies!

I’m new to this forum, mainly because recently I realised I wasn’t really coping with my history of abuse as well as I thought. I got out of an emotionally abusive relationship (detail removed by Moderator) years ago, it destroyed my confidence to a point where I couldn’t even recognise myself.
Once I escaped I threw myself into work and saved to go travelling, I’m currently in (detail removed by Moderator), loved travelling but I am now also ready to go home and begin a ‘normal life’. A job, a flat and my friends where I am completely in control, without having someone control me.

Basically I just wanted to introduce myself briefly, and also say that there is life and hope and independence after an abusive relationship. It takes time, don’t expect things to change overnight, but just know that it will change. Your time will come and you will start living the rest of your life!

I have written about my experience and found it has really helped me, does anyone know where I could post this or who I could send it to? I want to help others as well as helping myself

And remember…a queen is still a queen without a King.

[Healthyarchive]

Dear Queen, thanks for this positive & inspiring post☺☺☺yes I agree, there is light & a happy life at the end of the tunnel. I have experienced that after abuse too Xxxx

[Queen13]

Thats great to hear Healthyarchive 🙂 hope to hear lots more like this.
I’m hoping if anyone is feeling like they can’t escape, stories of people that have will help.
X*x

[Healthyarchive]

Yes that is what I hope too 😊, I post quite a lot with examples of breaking free & the “other side”, it is wrong to spend your life in fear when it can be so much better, girl power💪💪💪💪💪 to all of the women on this forum x*x

[Ayanna]

Welcome Queen 13. You did well to see the world and do what you want.
Keep it like that.
I am unsure whether a full recovery after abuse is possible. Depending on the length of the abuse there will always be scars that can open up with triggers.
Do you consider counseling when you are home?

[Queen13]

Hi Ayanna,
Unfortunately I am inclined to agree, especially during the beginning of new relationships.
I don’t think there will ever be a full recovery, as I feel the abuse and my experiences have shaped who I am. Accepting this is a part of the process of moving on.
Since starting to think this through even more I am definitely considering counselling. Talking this through more with someone who knows how to ask the right questions would really help
X

[Serenity]

Hi Queen,

I am glad you recovered so well to travel.

I don’t think the effects of abuse ever completely disappear- but you learn to compartmentalise things once you have received proper support and counselling etc, and it becomes like a small graze that sometimes gets irritated, and not a gaping wound.

I think continuing to surround yourself with a support network of people who understand helps keep you strong.

[hoodwinked]

Hi Queen13, your comments are so lovely to hear first thing this morning…..I am only just at the very start of my ‘out’ journey and not great, but stories like yours give me hope…..it has been this blog over the last weeks that have been a life saver for me, the support and understanding I have receive, it is difficult for people to understand who have never gone through this, so when speaking on here I know ‘you know’ and that is worth more than anything. I am going to a counsellor and yes the right questions help to clarify things for you x

[Author]

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