Hi Ssss
I just wanted to show you some support along with Darcy.
I am sorry to hear that you are struggling, and I hope you feel able to post again if you need to talk things through.
You could also chat to a Women’s Aid worker in confidence via our Live Chat service (weekdays 10am – 4pm and 10am – 12pm weekends). They won’t tell you what to do, but can discuss your situation and signpost you to other support that’s relevant for you. You can access the chat service here: https://chat.womensaid.org.uk/
Take care and keep posting,
Lisa