Viewing 4 reply threads
  • Author
    • #17542

      Just simply proud to say that I helped my friend today, the one who has mobility issues. I popped round to her place today as it is her day off work and I found her still not dressed (past midday) and looking sad. I had a cuppa with her and we talked about me and the SS story so far.

      She said her daughter had prepared her own spare bedroom should I need to move in again. I said many thank you’s…

      Then my friend said could I lend her £2 to go to work on the bus tomorrow. I guessed what was going on, she has no money left and won’t be able to go to work. She would have to walk and simply cannot, her leg drags as she walks and her back is in pain, one of her upper limbs does not lift.

      I gave her what was in my purse, just over £3 and said just take it.

      She then asked if I wouldn’t mind buying some milk and bread as she had none left and to take the money out of the amount I gave her. I went shopping round her local corner shop and took £10 out of my account and bought the items and a bunch of flowers for her to cheer her up. I came back and put the items away and put the flowers in a vase for her which I placed in the living room.

      She mentioned that she rarely ever has flowers.

      She then opened her mail and had a hospital appointment letter, she said she had one on …June and now that new one a few days later, and she said she could not afford two trips in the same week so she rang the hospital and asked me to stay with her during the call. She does have to attend both.

      I told her to write the dates on a piece of paper for me, and said I would drive her to both.

      I then asked her how she was going to go to work after tomorrow…no answer. I asked again. She said one day at a time because after tomorrow she may be dead, who knows…

      I waited for her while she went to the bathroom and prepared the left over change from my purse, what was left after the shopping at her corner store. I gave the change to her and said to use it for the next few days, having asked her how much the bus trip costs her. There is enough to sort her out till the weekend but not till her pay day.

      I will go back and visit her tomorrow night. I will cook for her and sing songs with her. She is developing OCD habits, I saw her check a door handle over 15 times, same with the freezer which I checked for food for the next few days, it is crammed with food, goodness knows if the food is out of date…I will buy fresh ingredients, bring fresh veggies and eggs from home and home made yogurts. I like it when I please her with the food she likes.

      It is sad, so sad. I must go and see her more often, she eats rubbish, stays alone, has no help from her grown up kids and I have to cut her lawn. They do nothing for her. They barely visit her. But they go on holidays…

      She makes me sad to know she struggles so much. She had serious accidents yet she still works full time with great difficulties. Today she rejoiced because she has hot water again, the gas man came.

    • #17557

      Omg, this is so sad. Why do SS not help her? But why do I even ask this question …
      You are a wonderful person, Bridget. The world needs people like you.

    • #17575

      Hi Ayanna, SS are not involved because she is not aware she can ask for help. I asked her to get a doctor’s appointment for me to come with her to start the process of registering her as disabled. Her children dont help her yet they are in their (removed by moderator)
      My friend also wants to carry on working so she sees people, she would be totally alone otherwise. (Removed by moderator) She sees lots of regular customers who speak and joke with her.
      I am not a wonderful person Ayanna, I just don’t like leaving her to suffer. It could be me. It’s dreadful watching someone struggle and survive, just survive.
      Her physical pain is terrible yet she works. I don’t know how she carries on.
      If everyone cared for the people around them, we would have a better community spirit.
      My worry is what will she become when she is much older.
      She offered me her home and provided a room for me when I needed it. She is poor but she has a good heart. My rich friend would not do a fraction of what she does for me. My other friends would think about the disturbance they would experience if they got me to stay at their home. One of them told me she would only see me in a month time, when she is less busy. I get the message. Don’t bother me.
      My friend simply needs “action people” who can make things happen such as organising benefits etc. She is not educated but it doesn’t make her a lesser person. She needs to have encouragement and support. There are times when we all need someone. We may lose hope and interest in ourselves. We just need a lifting hand. She reminds me of these old age pensioners who live alone. She just needs someone who takes an interest and who can smile with her.
      I would feel ashamed if I didn’t help. I feel happy when she is happy.

    • #17601
      Twisted Sister

      you are one awesome friend to her (as she has been to you – if only there were more of this in the world)

      its lucky you have found each other. Really feel for her with such difficulties 🙁

      I’m sure with your help she’ll be able to access quite a lot of help now.

      how wonderful of you xxKS

    • #17608

      What you do is rare, Bridget. I hope you get the ball rolling and she can get the support that she needs.

      I have given up on the so called friends who never have time, but when it comes to posh parties where they are invited for free they suddenly have all the time in the world. Never again…..

Viewing 4 reply threads
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.

© 2024 Women's Aid Federation of England – Women’s Aid is a company limited by guarantee registered in England No: 3171880.

Women’s Aid is a registered charity in England No. 1054154

Terms & conditionsPrivacy & cookie policySite mapProtect yourself onlineMedia │ JobsAccessibility Guide

Log in with your credentials


Forgot your details?

Create Account

Skip to content