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    • #56737
      Anonymous
      Participant

      So some women rang him and he first said it’s (detail removed by moderator) . I can’t cope with what he is doing to me anymore I have started drinking again which he is aware of. Feel so weak and powerless. He then proposed to me and I said nothing as I’ve started drinking again then he proposes how does that even work. I feel like my life is a mess and I don’t care about myself anymore. Is this normal?

    • #56740
      KIP.
      Participant

      It’s normal for someone who’s being abused. Google the cycle of abuse. He’s messing with your head. Time to go no contact. Many abusers are also serial cheaters. Mine was. Liars and cheaters.

    • #56747
      SunshineRainflower
      Participant

      Hi there,

      It sounds like you have been worn down by his abuse, if drinking is a coping mechanism it is no wonder you are doing it. However if you can I would recommend using a different coping mechanism as you are more vulnerable if you are drinking around him plus he could use it to say you’d imagined things or accuse you of things. Seek support from the helpline and your local domestic abuse support team and you can put a plan of action together to leave then go no contact. My ex was cheating on me too with what I think was multiple people, these men have no morals and there is no future of happiness with them, but you can 100% create a wonderful future for yourself once you are free of him so keep going and don’t lose hope.

    • #56777
      Anonymous
      Participant

      I feel like I still need a drink. I don’t understand how a man can push me this far. He said it was his cousin that rang and she looked like a young women. He has changed his number now why do I have so much doubt. After all the put downs I still stayed and now this will it ever end. I said no to the marriage. I hope I am making the right choice just right now I do not trust him. He is (detail removed by Moderator) years older than me I have been in 2 abusive relationships before the signs are there and I still can’t leave it’s like I am so use to it now that I accept it.

    • #56780
      KIP.
      Participant

      He is a liar. Why change his number if it was only his cousin? Why propose marriage at such a time. Even if you said yes I believe he would find an excuse to get out of it. He sounds just like my abusive ex. Saying what you want to hear to keep you from leaving. These men go and line up a new victim when they sense their current victim is planning to leave. Expert manipulators. If you can’t find the strength to leave on your own then please contact your local women’s aid and get help. Using alcohol to cover up the hurt he is causing you will only make things worse. You need to get rid of the cause of your problems not just deal with the symptoms x

    • #56783
      Anonymous
      Participant

      I can’t do it anymore. I don’t know what to believe anymore part of me has just given up. I don’t want to believe he is cheating on me. But then why not ring her in front of me to confirm it is his cousin. I am tired of this life with him. I have only been with him (detail removed by Moderator) months and he is the one who’s drove me to drinking yes it’s my own choice but I feel pushed constantly I feel like nothing. I am in denial of the abuse what is wrong with me.

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