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    • #123980
      Busyditch
      Participant

      Without giving specifics, I’ve got the ‘green light’ today… I had a huge panic attack and fainted. I was home alone!! Such an idiot!! 😳

      I can’t cope with my feelings… I can’t even describe my feelings.

      Am I going to be strong enough to do this? I can’t even cope when I get the go ahead.

    • #123981
      Busyditch
      Participant

      I’m not even making much sense!!! 😩

    • #123990
      Watersprite
      Participant

      It’s normal to feel like this at this time. Focus on the plan and the strategy remind yourself why you are doing this and keep telling yourself you can even if you think you can’t. I’ve no idea how I did it but I did and so can you x*x

    • #124001
      ISOPeace
      Participant

      Busyditch you are not an idiot! You are reacting to strong feelings and fears from years of build up.

      I can’t speak for others, but I was more scared about thinking about leaving than I was when I actually did it. Once I was taking action it was easier than I expected (he wasn’t around of course). I also tried to talk to myself and others as thought I was definitely going ahead with it. I made sure I didn’t say “I’m hoping to leave….” and instead said “I’m going to leave…..”.

      You can do this despite the fear. I know it doesn’t feel good but it’s totally normal to be scared.

      Sending love and strength xxxx

    • #124008
      Busyditch
      Participant

      Thank you.

      I feel so alone, despite coming here, speaking to the people helping me including my GP. Is it because I haven’t seen anyone face to face? It’s feels like what my eyes don’t see my brain will convince me it’s not happening? I’m so confused, I don’t understand how I feel I can’t make sense of anything. I question everything all the time.

      To top it all I’m in so much pain, I’ve got a serious brain condition and my head feels like it’s going to split open. 🤕

    • #124021
      Catjam
      Participant

      Hi, I’m in the same position and feel like I am on a roller coaster. One minute looking forward to finding out who I am and the next sobbing about leaving him and the pain it will cause.
      I have taken baby steps, so many times I have wanted to cancel and stay exactly where I am. Financially secure and no worries about future family events. But I am not living, I am existing. I don’t know what are my thoughts and what are his.
      We are stronger than we give ourselves credit for. It’s going to be really hard and I’m dreading the next few weeks and months but hopefully life can only get better.
      Take care and stay strong xx

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