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I made what was hopefully the final contact today. He’s on (detail removed by moderator) and for the last (detail removed by moderator)I’ve been making any necessary contact with his relative. I shipped the rest of his stuff some days ago along with The Papers… (cost a fortune I don’t have 😡) I didn’t think I could ask anyone else to do this for me.
I sent the shipping documents to his relative via social media. I wanted to make sure they’d received them before I block them forever, so waited for that notification to say they’d received it. They took the opportunity to send me photos of him. And the family members I loved and I miss so much. And it’s killing me. All the months of hard work getting through this, and I’m sat outside crying because now I miss him. And them. And I want so much to say to his family that it’s not them, that I love and miss them, they are lovely people and I want them to know I don’t hate them like they must think I do.
Big backward step. Thank god for the nightmare that is immigration otherwise I’d cave in. I”d go back. I can see now how easily this happens when your abuser is in the same country.
But that’s it. The door is closed and my life will continue and I’ll make a new happy some day.
Advice for anyone in a similar position – try your best to find someone to do the contact for you if it’s absolutely necessary because going backwards after so long is f*ing hard.
I’ll pick myself up. Over (detail removed by moderator) of abuse has given me thick skin and I’ll survive.
Sorry for the rant but don’t know anyone else who would understand xx
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Thank you ladies. @eggshells I’m out on a shopping spree later to spend more of my non existent money 😬 xx
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