- This topic has 8 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 9 months ago by
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We were not put onto this earth for this…………. There is the chance of happiness, moments of joy, feeling relaxed, smiling, feeing great, your children having fun & achieving, doing kids things. X*X
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Brings it home don’t it some women are living on a knife edge every day. If only there was an easy solution for it all. x
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The solution is to get out and avoid getting involved with these men in the first place. I know that saying that and doing that can be difficult, really difficult. There are so many mental bonds and ties, reasons why women get together with these men in the first place, but this is really serious. There is no time for messing about. One of these women was brutally murdered in front of her 3 young children, this will traumatise them for life. The women being abused just need to get out, its really as simple as that. I’m sorry if i’m overlooking or not appreciating how difficult it is, I understand that. But this article has frightened me and us women need to take firm immediate action. We can deal with the mental trauma and associated difficulties afterwards.
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You are right, we aren’t put on the earth for this.
When my marriage ended, although he’s treated me like —-, I felt a failure because I was another statistic of a broken marriage, my kids would have divorced parents, I felt I should have somehow been able to rescue it all.
I even worked in the area of marriage and families.
Now, I never want to hear about another wedding as long as I live. I don’t trust marriage. My identity is not just as a mother not was it only as a wife. These abusers try to make to lose your identity and wreck your joy and freedom.
I don’t extol marriage anymore. It’s not what I aspire to. I’m not defined by if I was married or not. I am me.
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Thanks Serenity. I know that the emotional ties that keep people in these relationships can be so binding. I got married, I knew after 12 months that I had made a mistake, but I couldn’t leave for (detail removed by moderator) years after that. There were a variety of reasons for this, my loyalty, not knowing my rights, feeling that I had made my bed and had to lie in it. I know its not black & white and saying just leave as it,s not as simple as that. But when you see news stories like this it puts it all into a new perspective, your life is more important than anything. There is a lot of support and help now for women to break away and get through the separation. I have for all of my adult life been in relationships, a number of these were with abusive men, so I couldn’t just stop it, probably something from childhood. But I don’t want to get killed. My last relationship lasted sometime with him being horrible to me, but I couldn’t end it I thought it was all my fault. So I really do sympathize. It’s so important that we get away from these murderers.
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I agree it is important but those ties that bind are sometimes out of fear or loyalty or because there is no other viable solution to the woman at that time. I am coming from the perspective of someone still here of course. It will never be straightforward no matter how much help is out there. x
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I new if i did not get out i would have been murdered. He was stalking my facebook and was using my posts as weapons . Even other freinds comments it was so so scary
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