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    • #91292
      Anonymous
      Inactive

      Hello lovelies I hope you are all doing as well as can be! I’m just wondering is it possible to get PTSD after leaving an abusive relationship. I’m often finding myself having nightmares about him, jumping when I hear his name, I panic when I hear loud noises and go into shut down mode crying & feeling sick because the loud noises creates these flashbacks where I’m back with him and he’s banging around the house when he’s mad and in a mood. Someone came up behind me and touched my arm and I jumped shouted get off me because I instantly thought it was him even though I know it can’t be as he’s in prison but I started shaking and feeling sick because it was like he was grabbing me and hurting me all over again. I’m just wondering if this is PTSD and have any of you ever experienced the same?

    • #91312
      NeverGiveUp1
      Participant

      Hi there!
      I’m new to this and yet to put my own story up but yes you will have PTSD by the sounds of it and it’s more than possible. I have been diagnosed With this too after leaving my abusive ex in (detail removed by moderator), I have nightmares every night, mainly about him – or if it’s not him it’s the same scenario , someone trying to get me or get into my house (he did this).
      I’m regularly irritated, I’ve walked out of three jobs because of my own bad temper which I seem to have gotten since all his. I’m constantly on high defence alert, which can make me very short, abrupt etc. I’m waiting for therapy because I won’t let him ruin my future.

    • #91313
      NeverGiveUp1
      Participant

      Also, I too get the loud noise thing… I get an instant adrenaline rush when there’s a loud bang, legs like jelly shaking etc… once someone knocked at my door and I got really scared and panicky but it was just the delivery man. It’s a horrible experience to go through but you’re not alone x

    • #91316
      Iwantmeback
      Participant

      I think living with an abuser all of us develop PTSD or even cptsd to varying degrees. Try and do some deep breathing and keep repeating I am fine or I am safe. Someone was at my door the other night too, I sat there so scared to answer the door. I don’t want to be like that for the rest of my life, I won’t let him affect my future. But healing from abuse takes time, I think as well it can depend on how long you were with him and the extent of the abuse, for me it was more psychological with threats of violence to me, my dogs and members of my family.
      Best wishes IWMB 💞💞

    • #91340
      Anonymous
      Inactive

      Is aggression a symptom of ptsd then? I’m always very short & aggressive toned towards some people but didn’t think that was a symptom of ptsd x

    • #91345
      PurpleTriangle
      Participant

      I left my ex a few years ago now and I have ptsd, I jump at the slightest noise, and I can go from 0 to 100 in a second when I see red, which is so not me usually. Aggression is a side of ptsd .. it comes under the fight or flight mode. If I cant cope with certain situations I run away, which is what I used to do when my ex used to start a fight. I always thought my relationship was only psychological, but now I’ve realised that its not just punching that is classed as violent, I was often used as target practice when he felt like launching a mug or other hard objects at my head.

      Like Iwantmeback said it takes time for someone who has been abused to heal, but you will get through it with the right support.

    • #91371
      hop
      Participant

      I haven’t been with him for nearly a decade and I’ve got ptsd. For years they were trying to diagnose me with a personality disorder that I didn’t have. Living with it for such a long time has entrenched the abuse code right through me and its so hard to unpick. Hold out for the therapy. It’s hard, even after all this time to comprehend what’s gone on but we’ll get there xx

    • #91391
      Fulmar
      Participant

      Hi lovely,
      Yes, you can have PTSD. It’s the most horrible feeling. Someone I know came up behind me in a supermarket and touched my arm and I completely freaked out. I think he must have thought I was a right w****o. I had curled up on the floor panic attacks when he messaged me and panicked every time my phone buzzed. When you’re feeling at the worst you could try rectangular breathing, a long deep breath in and a short breath out. The other thing I find helps is visualisation, I shut my eyes and think of somewhere that I feel utterly calm and peaceful, and then I imagine putting all the anxiety and stress and horrible stuff in to a cloud or a box or something and pushing it away from me. It takes practice but it does help sometimes. x*x

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