- This topic has 3 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 2 years, 8 months ago by Watersprite.
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31st July 2021 at 7:18 pm #129474Tired of thisParticipant
For years, I have put up with a barrage of verbal abuse. I’m working with a psychologist and lawyer to leave my husband with my children. But it’s the verbal abuse which stays with. For years I’ve been called an worthless piece of s**t, c**t, neglectful mother etc etc. And now the words stay with me. I think often about (detail removed by moderator) because I cannot live like this. Has anyone else navigated a way through this?
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31st July 2021 at 7:35 pm #129475KIP.Participant
Yes I navigated my way to the police and they removed him for me. I was just so frozen with years of abuse. Know that his game is to break you. To destroy your self esteem and confidence. It’s so hard to leave when we feel that bond to them but they are not bonded to us. It boils down to you or him and for the sake of your children please choose you and make that safe exit plan with women’s aid x it helped me to educate myself by reading Living with the Dominator. Researching the cycle of abuse, the power and control wheel, cognitive dissonance, gas lighting and reading Lundy Bancroft. I often thought of ending my life because of abuse but I wouldn’t deprive my child of a mother nor give my abuser the satisfaction but those feelings of total despair come from contact with an abuser and going forward you want to work on zero contact.
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1st August 2021 at 8:31 am #129482Tired of thisParticipant
Thank you for your reply. I’m researching counselling and EMDR – I have specific things he says stuck in my head – mostly ‘you’re worthless’ and I am wondering if specific trauma counselling might help. I have read some of the books you mentioned and they are excellent. Will continue working on getting him to move out.
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1st August 2021 at 9:12 am #129485WaterspriteParticipant
Hello you will start feeling your worth when you are no longer exposed to his abuse. It’s his behaviour not you that is making you feel this. Keep moving forwards you are doing so well don’t underestimate your progress x
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