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    • #12872
      Confused123
      Participant

      With my eldest, just think i will never get through to him, again today is just demanding things to be done his way, am refusing but just making life so hard for me , maybe its my fault , last week i said since his not eating food i buy and wasting i will give x amount of money and he can survivie on that, it worked well even though food was unhealthy, was going to do again this week but his mobile bill went over so i said that money would go on his mobile bill which he agreed, but now is being so aqward, swear wish life would get easier,, everytime i seem to be on top, he wears me down emotionally

    • #12876
      Serenity
      Participant

      I sympathise, also having two boys. We love them, but we are d****d if we are going to have them grow into perpetrators with a sense of entitlement!

      Being a good mum will involve sometimes having little fallings out with them, as you try to guide them on the right path, but we must be wary that they aren’t abusing us.

      Just stand firm, give him for reasons in a succinct form ( teens don’t like lectures!) and ask him- if he argues- to think of why you are making such a request. Get him to start thinking and reflecting!

      It’s easy to get emotionally pulled in and drained when they behave like this, and what I do is utter the 70/30 division in my head ( I am only 70% a mum, I am 30% me, so when they are pushing my buttons, retreat to that 30%!).

      I think it’s good for our kids- even teens- to see that positive behaviour gets attention, negative behaviour doesn’t get attention , but to always keep the lines of communication open and to stay firm with our boundaries x

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