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    • #50450
      Unicornsandrainbows
      Participant

      I’ve spoke to the helpline and the only refuge available for me and my children are (detail removed by Moderator) miles or more away.

      I haven’t got a car anymore so I’d be more isolated there than I am here. That’s what scares me.

      What do I do? Why are there no refuges closer.

    • #50451
      keepmovingfoward
      Participant

      my understanding and correct me if im wrong is to put space between you and your abuser to reduce the chance of you being tracked down. so although (detail removed by Moderator) miles might seem like a long way, it should keep you a safe distance away from him.

      isolation shouldn’t be a factor unless your concerned about your family and friends, and again, from a safety perspective you need to consider where he’s likely to look for you once it all takes place.

      refuges have support staff and other women living there going through the same things as you, if you need company someone will be there for you to talk to,if you need time alone you are safe there too.

      refuges can help you set up new housing, schools and practically a new life away from your previous one without the risk of crossing path with your abuser, personally if i lived within 5 miles of my abuser i’d be constantly anxious that id walk past him in the street or something.

      at the end of the day only you can make the decision.

    • #50452
      Unicornsandrainbows
      Participant

      But I have family and friends who only know part of what I’m going through. My children have a close relationship with there grandad and auntie. I feel I’d be taking them away from them too.

      I feel like I’m in limbo. I don’t know if the council can help me. I’m going to talk tomo to get more support from my health visitor she mentioned getting support for myself.

      I’m feeling guilty again of thinking of getting away. It’s awful but he’s awful too

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