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Hi ladies,
I have been out of my relationship for a while now, when i reported him to the police. I only reported at the time, a few of the things that happened, mainly due to me being scared, and to be honest everything was such a blur at the time, that when the Police asked me if there was anything else, i just said no. After a while now to have time to let the ‘fog’ clear, i realise now how completely oblivious i was at the time, to how much abuse was going on. I feel a lot of guilt and anger at myself really, for not telling the police everything, However now i think, so this isn’t right, the things he did, and have wrote everything i can possibly think of that happened. The only problem is i cant remember dates, other than saying roughly what month however i know what year. My worry is if i do go to the Police now, are they going to take any of this seriously? Or will they think i must be lying as i had the chance to tell them. Some things i’m not even sure if it is a crime, but to me it feels very wrong and i am sick of keeping it inside, and having constant flash backs to them. I feel that if i can report it, it might help just to get it off my chest, and if they can do anything about it then great. Sorry for the long post. I’m just so scared of reporting it, but im sick of keeping his secrets! -
I have recently reported an historic rape, and I was asked to make a 2nd interview as I had forgotten so much of what had happened. It really is worth going back and saying that you would like to add to your statement. It is so important to be believed and also to find the help and support you need now. The police can provide a good starting point. Go for it, don’t feel bad about it and start dumping the rubbish where it should go… Not around your shoulders! I hope it goes well.
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They took it seriously. It was good to be believed. The police have spoken to him. Of course he denied everything. My ex denied everything as well. The former has been NFA’d which I was told at the beginning was likely, so unless anyone else comes forward, he will just remain as a record. It was such a long time ago that I expect any other women have chosen to forget.
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Thank you Maddog for replying. I suddenly feel really scared to actually do it, although i did contact Victims support for some advise and they were wonderful. They basically said the same, that i should report it, and even if nothing comes from it, its there on record. Im just taking little steps at the moment, so ive wrote everything down, i rang Victims support, and my next step is to contact the officer who i originally spoke to and say i want to make a statement. I dont know why i feel so nervous, i guess its because i havent actually said out loud to anyone really what exactly happened but i know i will feel so much better to just get it out there.
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