Sexual abuse

[mummy]

So I’ve been reading up on sexual abuse and sexual violence and as both ex partners violated me I am in a lost place and feel I was just like a prostitute to them when they wanted sex and if I didn’t comply with what they wanted I was punished either by force or made to feel guilty for not pleasing them so I carried on with things I didn’t want to do. Has anyone any experience or advice on this as I feel very lost and worthless x

[KIP.]

Hey mummy, yes I went through this but please remember that their disgusting behaviour is no reflection on you. You did what you had to do to survive and get through and stay safe. I rang the rape crisis helpline and they were really kind and helpful. It’s good to talk to someone who understands x

[SunshineRainflower]

It sounds awful what you have been through, yes I can relate. I was thinking today that I have felt like a sex worker with my past boyfriends and I’m reluctant to get involved with anyone else for more of the same. It’s like they are totally self centred on their sexual needs and don’t care how we feel. I think it’s very common for abusive men to be abusive in many ways including sexually. What they did to you was not your fault and you are not alone in your experience.

Like Kip said the rape crisis helpline could help, I think there are other sexual abuse organisations too you can contact, I remember finding some in a google search but have forgotten the names. I rang an organisation called Napac which is for survivors of childhood sexual abuse and they were amazing and so understanding. I’m sure many ladies on here can also relate to your experience too.

[Ayanna]

So many of us have been through this.
Domestic abuse very often includes sexual abuse.
I hate men because of the sexual abuse that I had suffered.

[mummy]

Thank you all the effects of all parts of abuse certainly change u as a person. For me being abused sexually has left me at a real low and as if that was my only purpose maybe that’s one of the reasons i went from one to another. I have been unsure how to get through this so thankyou again for your advice x

[SunshineRainflower]

Also, some sort of counselling or therapy focused on recovery from abuse and sexual trauma might help you, I’m not sure if you’ve had it before? I found a really nice local womens group with this focus, it came up when I did a google search and my DV outreach worker also mentioned it. Have you got a DV worker you could ask about organisations like this that you could access? The one I go to has a weekly group plus courses and therapy. It’s really been helping me on my recovery journey.

It’s totally normal to feel super low afer sexual abuse, it violates the mind, body and soul and is traumatic. You are a beautiful soul worthy of love and respect, what the abusers did does not in any way reflect on your worth and purpose, it just shows their own pathology. Your job now is to heal and recover, really care for, be kind to yourself and protect yourself.

[Anonymous]

Yes I went through this you certainly not alone hun … he made me feel sick..keep strong hun hugs

[Author]

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