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I have this overwhelming and overbearing sense of utter shame and humiliation. A professional is supposed to be helping me and keeps calling off sick on the day sometimes with just minutes to spare. I’ve tried for so long not to let it bother me but it feels like rejection and it’s affecting much worse than I can admit to other people. Everything is becoming really hard. I lie to the dr because I feel ashamed at being sacked off all the time. I know if I tell them my real feelings that they will overreact. I just don’t know how to behave and I dont like losing control like this. I put my faith in a person who cannot keep to the agreement. It makes me feel like a fool for ever believing things could be different! But then I feel guilty because I know they’ve been trying their best
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I’d be furious. That’s completely unprofessional by letting you down repeatedly and I’d speak to her supervisor or ask to change therapists. Feeling out of control does make us feel incredibly vulnerable again. Even more reason for you to work with someone reliable. And she should know this. Don’t lie to the doctor. What you’re feeling is perfectly understandable. You need people who you can trust especially now.
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I feel really guilty reading your reply kip. I dont think it’s her fault and she’s tried to help me do much. I’m a grown up and should stop being such a baby. The dr wants a nurse to come round and see but. But when they tell me I need that support all kinds of crazy start coming out if me. I’m trying so hard to keep it all in
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