Should have left it alone. Scared to spend Xmas alone

[Awayfromhome]

I just left with the GP after being advised to tell them about the DA to have a record of it.

She was kind, but it made me very nervous when she said she might get in contact with social services when I said that my LOne sometimes is scared of their dad. It is not always, it is not constant, but some ocasiona he has been.

I wanted to wait for Xmas to pass to kind of get the gears rolling and move to either temporary accommodation or a refuge, because I wanted to give that to my LO a lovely Xmas with their parental family (that adores them) before everything. As I know they won’t be able to see no one for few months at least once everything is done.

Now there is not backing up. Now I need to leave. Now I am doubting myself and thinking that maybe I went too far. That I should have tried to sort things out as family.

Don’t know what to do! Don’t know what is going to happen next. Don’t know if I can wait.

Now we are in a honeymoon phase, so wanted to take advantage of that, for my LO.

I am scared they will take our LO away from me and that he gets into a system.

What is going to happen

[NewAmsterdam]

Hi Awayfromhome,
Well done for speaking to your GP. That is a massive step!
Your post really spoke to me, as I am in a similar position and was only today thinking about Christmas. I am planning on leaving in the next couple of weeks and my heart is breaking for my kids and for all the Christmas traditions we will lose. BUT I keep reminding myself why I am doing this.
You are being brave for yourself and your children. They will still have a great Christmas, it will just be different. I’m planning on starting new traditions and keeping busy if they are with their dad. Here if you need to talk. X

[Hereforhelp]

Hi awayfromhome, well done or speaking with your GP, that is a big step and can feel quite scary afterwards.

There’s never a right time to leave in my opinion, Christmas will come and go but the abuse will be there, tensions under the surface. Then birthdays and other important dates come and go… when you are ready you will leave, when the time is right for you whether that’s before or after Christmas. I left at a time (I can’t be specific on this forum) which was meant to be an occasion, I left during the build up to that occasion as I decided I didn’t want my children to have a false memory, if that makes sense, as my ex would ‘act’ great for a while but it would always end in heartache as he was acting.

Do what you can cope with in your time and take baby steps, everyday you get through you are pushing forward as you now see the abuse. You haven’t gone too far, you are helping yourself and your children, your ex is responsible for his own actions ❤️

[StrongLife]

Hi there,

Just wanted to suggest what I now do for Christmas.

I go to a community organised Christmas with many people, singers, food, three course meal in a lovely setting. There are kids there as well. It is free. There are many organised around.it’s on every year.

Hope that helps

[Author]

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