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I have had a phone call today my councilling starts on (detail removed by moderator)! I really wanted yo start processing all he has done to me in the hope it would get my ptsd under control. But now i have found out i cant talk about anytjing he might still be prosecuted for. In other words all the sexual stuff, yet its this i struggle with the most i still hesr him coming up the stsirs still feel him on me. I can talk about my feelings but not incidents. Why i dont know it doesn’t change anything!
I feel gutted
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Hi, MIght it be possible if you have a good counsellor for her to delve into those places that you don’t particularly want to go. I am told it can be quite intensive depending on the person. You might suprise yourself after a few sessions and feel more at ease about opening up and allowing the process to happen x
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Really stuck at what to do. I’ve tried just submitting and not being happy or socialising and etc etc so he had nothing to be angry about but it’s like he needs chaos. But when I try to leave he makes it so difficult and it’s just getting worse. We tried couple counselling and he’s angry that he’s been told it’s him that needs to change and that his excuses arent justified, my counsellor thinks I should wait to see if he changes. How long can you wait?? I can’t do anything right anymore but I don’t even know what I’m doing wrong. He gets angry at anything
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This sounds a bit like my situation with our counselling ( not your ptsd – that sounds awful for you, sorry ). But we have had couples counselling and he is not really listening or accepting his part in all of the situation. My counsellor said that after 28days of constantly changed behaviour it should be easier for that change to become permanent but he had to want to change and recognise what needs to be changed. My man is different because of the counselling and the mess we are in but his old self is still bubbling away under the surface. I see it, I sense it and I hear it. I don’t think he will really change. Not sure if this helps at all but I wish you the best – I have found counselling on my own far more productive than couples counselling as I was still too scared to really open up in front of him. X
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Hi inneed, I think it is still well worth starting the counselling even though you’re obviously going to have to be careful. A You deserve as much support as you can part of therapy is building a good rapport with someone and learning trust in a safe place. You’ll struggle to heal until those basics are in place so why not get the ball rolling with that for now. Also I think there’s huge benefit in being able to express how hard it is to have PTSD. They may be able to help you learn coping strategies for dealing with flashbacks or self-harming etc that you might be struggling with. I have been so lucky my to get counselling, it has made such a difference to me and I really hope you find the same x*x
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Get a second opinion or change councellor. I talked about anything and everything even though court was pending. What helped with my PTSD was taking back control, I started divorcing him, I reported every historical incident, I took charge of my life and my home and I made my choices. When you flounder with no direction it makes the PTSD worse. Get a councellor who specialises in PTSD. Part of recovering from PTSD is that you either want to talk till the cows come home (which is what I did and it was great therapy to get it all out and help my brain process it) or withdraw and never want to talk about it. I think option one is healthier. I made a huge mistake of believing what the professionals told me. From doctors to solicitors but I soon learned that these professionals make mistakes too. Challenging them is good for your self esteem and confidence. Challenge and keep challenging till you’re satisfied in your own mind❤️❤️
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