Sorry, need just a little help.

[Potkettle]

I dont know where to start. I cant really start because I just cant think.
I have had some help on the phone. They want me to write it down, all of it. I just dont know how. My mind just jumps and then I cry.
I know I need to organise it but I just cant
Is there some way to start?
Thank u xx

[nbumblebee]

Sit. Take a deep breath close your eyes for a minute or two and just breethe then when you are ready write get it all out its not easy and it will hurt like hell but once you are done walk away breeth again and rest.
Xx

[Scarecrow]

Hi Potkettle,

I have been in your shoes, it is almost like a fog that comes over you and stops you from being able to think clearly. I think that it is a form of mental defence mechanism – your brain protecting you from remembering things that are going to hurt you.

I totally echo what has been said above,take a breath, take your time and start. Would typing it be easier than writing it with pen and paper? Would voice notes be a place to start so you can get the words out and transfer them to paper at a later date?

I know how hard this is, but it really is something that will help you. You may even find that once you get the first thing down you will remember more. Starting is the hardest part.

Stay strong – you can do this

Hugs

Scarecrow

[Bananaboat]

You don’t have to do it all at once. Have a notepad or your phone handy so you can pick up / put down as the memories come. It’s not an exam, there’s no pressure xx

[Eggshells]

It can sometimes help to write it as a letter to him. You don’t ever send the letter but it can help to get it out.

Ask questions “Why did you do that?” Make statements “You hurt me.” Tell him how you feel “I hate the part of you that thought it was OK to do that to me.”

Just let it tumble out in any old order. xx

[Lottieblue]

When I started writing things down, I opened a special email account and sent myself emails. I started with things as they happened and how I was feeling, and I found this very quickly led to my remembering things from the near and distant past.
One thing I discovered though was that I had to record things as they happened (I’d nip to the loo with my phone) otherwise it would all just become one blur as it went on and on and by the end of the day I couldn’t separate any of it out.

[Potkettle]

Thank you all.
I’m trying honestly. x

[Hazydayz]

Youve been given some great support good advice, but you will do it your way in the end, in your own time and that’s how it is!. Don’t worry! If you want? here’s Just a little more help for you if it helps? Firstly, It’s ok! To ask for help. And…try not to worry, thats easier said! I know! But, in time you’ll hopefully see…with a little time for yourself if you can find the space? And some peace to allow you to think…? You’ll get there! To that time, when thoughts can become written words! When your able to in your own way? In your own time?sort things and see things more clearly. Your not alone with this. A lot of us here are on that same
Journey of discovery. A lot have reached their conclusions and kindly offer their wisdom to help and support
Good luck sweetie on finding your way? 💞

[Anonymous]

Is this something you have to do potkettle? as in a statement? If not there are no rules to say you have to write things down, it it’s something you feel you want to do to remind yourself what you’ve been through/how far you’ve come or as a reminder of gaslighting and abuse as facts so to not allow your ex back in your life again then that’s a really good idea, I’ve been writing things down also and yes it brings a lot of tears to the surface so I do mine bit by bit (I only found this post now, I’ve no idea why I didn’t see it earlier?) 🤗💖🤗

[Hereforhelp]

Hey Potkettle, I wanted to add…. when I went to write stuff down I also couldn’t as my mind would race… A DA support worker suggested that I write down the first incident I remember, The worst incident I remember and the last incident that I remembered.
Do everything at your own pace ❤

[Author]

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