Still trapped

[Stay or leave]

I am feeling so down at the moment. I have no energy left in me. But my eyes are wide open to his unreasonable behaviour. He is a nasty person who is only intrested in himself. He has mentally tortured me for a period of time.Children are involved. I must be strong for them. I have suffered and they have seen and heard the noise. I cant put them through this for another day. I will do everything I can to protect them. I feel like I am swimming and coming up for air. I am about to be free and he pushes me back down in the water. I become brainwashed believe him and the cycle starts again. Up for air my brain works when I go under Im not aware. Mentally I am drained. Feel like he is taking my breath away
Im allowing it. Why? I am stronger than this and more intelligent than him. My family and friends think I am a doormat for him to wipe his feet on. I am a slave to him.

[Lisa]

Dear Stay or leave,

I’m so sorry to read how you’re feeling at the moment; you explain the effects of the cycle of abuse and the FOG that comes with it. Sometimes it takes getting to a breaking point before you are pushed to take the next step.
It sounds like you are now very much aware of his abuse, but are trapped by the many practical and emotional barriers. If you are still residing in the same property he will continue to drag this out and your wellbeing will continue to be so negatively affected. You might need to start considering other ways to break the cycle; for example, could you move out temporarily to friends or family, whilst you try to get an occupation order in place to remove him, then return yourself?

If you haven’t yet got any local support in place please consider contacting your local domestic abuse service.

There is also support available from our Live Chat service. You can chat to a Women’s Aid worker in confidence (open every day). They won’t tell you what to do, but can discuss your situation and signpost you to other support that’s relevant for you.

Keep Posting,

Lisa

[Stay or leave]

Thanks. I have family and friends to support me too.

[Chocolatebunnie]

Your’e not alone still trapped

totally understand what you describe, its a difficult place to be and you are staying strong for your children.

I could have written this myself.

As Lisa has said reach out to services to support you, the others on here will give you advice too, Im still learning myself but just want to send you my support and hugs x*x

[Author]

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