Stopping child contact

[Lifebegins]

Hi Ladies, another week another abusive action. (detail removed by Moderator) I’ve just found out (and have the evidence) of abusive message sent to my child bad mouthing maternal family members and using very foul language! It beggars belief he can’t even be on his best behaviour whilst supervised contact is in place. This message has been distressing for my child as they’re very close to the family members their dad is being horrible about. My child is now considering if they even want to have any further contact with their dad as in their words ‘it’s such hard work and he never changes’ but I think they’re having difficulty with the responsibility of having to make that decision. So should I take it out of their hands and can I say no contact? Or can I even say no unsupervised contact due to emotional/verbal abuse? As well as continued physical risk, they’re being caused psychological distress. and its just so hard to watch as time and time again, they’re being drawn into the drama created by their dad’s bad behaviour and having to stress about it and cope with it. Some men just don’t deserve to be dads!!!!! Would really welcome some advice on this and happy for anyone to pm if there are legal specifics you’d like to share xx

[Lisa]

Hi Lifebegins,

This sounds like such a distressing situation, especially around your child thinking about whether they want contact going forward. How unfair of their dad to put them in that position. Coram have some good information about contact on their website and you could call their helpline or Rights of Women to discuss the legal side of things. It sounds like the supervised contact is through social services, in which case you could speak with Family Rights Group about your options and for support on deciding how best to proceed.

Take care and keep posting,
Lisa

[Lifebegins]

Thanks Lisa. I’ve had some private responses which have been really helpful. It’s hard being alone and having to keep dealing with this abuse still and now against your child. I know it is never going to change, these men don’t change and your children are the collateral damage. But I’m clear now on what action I can and will take. Thanks always to this great forum and the support that is given ❤️Xx what a great group of women we all are xx

[Author]

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