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    • #162738

      I don’t want to post any details this time because I don’t really want this post moderated.

      I’m finding this all so hard, my feelings are all over the place. I’m thinking getting an injunction might be necessary but I’m really worried. I don’t want to do anything to make things worse for myself. I feel stuck and scared

    • #162747
      Main Moderator

      Hi Buildmeupbuttercup,

      It’s normal to feel what you’re feeling right now and understandable that you’re worried that getting an injunction to protect yourself could be met with an escalation. Sometimes it can help ease worries to get some information about the process of getting an injunction, what to expect, and exactly what an injunction can do. DV Assist are a specialist injunctions service that you could contact to talk through these concerns to help you make your decision.

      Take care and keep posting,

    • #162748

      I don’t really have much advice Buttercup but I do know how you feel. I didn’t have any say in the matter (detail removed by Moderator).

      I was terrified about an escalation I won’t lie but I cranked up the security on my house cameras locks etc. The police put a couple of things in order for me my mobile number and address was to come up as an urgent assistance request if I was to call and male members of my family basically on call and ready to help if need be.

      My ex had been to prison on previous occasions said it didn’t bother him to go back so you can see my concern .. The restraining order in the early days he did break about three or four times contacting me through a mutual friend but it DID work he didn’t come near me or my property again and that’s you what you want.

      Some years have gone by since this ..though still fairly recent start of Covid and I’ve not heard anything now for a long time so I feel I am out of it. So just to say really it DID help in my situation.

      I do wish you all the best for the future just get what you can in place to protect you that you feel comfortable with and hopefully in time to come this will all just be one bad memory for you same as it is to me.

      All The Best .. x

      • #162761

        Dear Mrsbluesky,

        Thank you for your reply. I’m so glad that you’re out and that he’s not contacting you anymore! What you went through sounds really scary, especially since your ex wasn’t scared of going back to prison. I don’t know how mine feels about it since he’s never been, I just know he’d be angry at me for getting an injunction and he’d feel like he’d really lost me. I feel like my door has a pretty good lock but it’s my only exit which scares me. I’m a student and live hours from my male family so they’re not really an option either (plus I hide things from them because they’re abusive themselves). I will look into what I can do to increase my safety in other ways.

    • #163000

      Mrsbluesky I’m in that same boat. Prison is sleeping and the gym no big deal to him!! So I’m petrified to grass him up to police as he wud put it. That’s when he wud play nasty he’s sorry and promising change at the moment. I’ve fell for it before but sum of the posts I’ve read here have helped me stay away. (detail removed by Moderator) night away!! Missing him terribly however I feel less anxious. Feeling guilty alot today about the good times. But I’m not mentally strong enough to continue the abuse daily. So I’m not!! Trauma bonding shocked the sense into me when I’ve read about it. Thanku everybody for ur posts. Hope u all find peace 💛

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