Struggling because he’s not coping

[Trying-to-heal]

Morning

(Detail removed by moderator) I found out my ex partner has been beaten up and left with some nasty facial injuries. Despite him telling people that me and my children did this to him, which I’m really annoyed with, I’m still concerned for his welfare, and find this situation really sad. We have zero contact, which will remain this way; I’m just struggling with feeling so sorry for him, and the thought of someone hurting him (even though he’s hurt me for decades).

Sadly he’s now a drug addict, so he’ll be surrounded by unsavoury kinds of people. I’ve always helped him with his numerous problems throughout our relationship and it’s painful that I can’t help him this time. I just want him to be safe. It breaks my heart.

[Bananaboat]

As horrible as it is, you can’t help him. In fact you are helping him by keeping your distance and not enabling him. Your kind heart makes you worry but even the fact he’s telling people you did this, shows his true colours. Look after you and your kids and stay strong x

[Trying-to-heal]

I know everything you’re saying is right. Sadly the drugs have taken any part of him that was ‘nice’. Thank you x

[Boho356]

I felt the same for my narc, I felt sorry for him because he wasn’t coping on his own as I basically done everything for him. One of his relatives told me (detail removed by moderator) that they have to stop with him from time to time to keep him company now I can’t help bit laugh about it. He’s got to battle his own demons now hun honestly the sympathy will vanish in time.

[Anonymous]

Everyone is right the best way to help him and yourself is by keeping away , addiction is a terrible thing , my ex has a serious alcohol issue , all I was used for was to enable him and be abused , so I paid for the privilege in a way . You can’t help him now and you need to put yourself first and your children , his chosen his path in life , don’t let his addiction or demons drag you down with him x

[Author]

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