After dreading Christmas day without my children/grandchildren. But it was lovely not listening to the swearing, him getting more and more tense. The last few years no rapes as he couldn’t manage it, though I can still feel his hand on my head pushing it down to you know where.
It’s my first year without us being together, though in the same house. It is scary being there when he been drinking.
But like you how could I have lived thinking the shouting, abuse physical and mental became the norm.
Trauma bonding I think its called.