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    • #18164
      godschild
      Participant

      I feel very tearful this past week and no energy, I am post menopausal do know these sypmtoms can be that but can the effects of abuse make you feel this way, I could just sit and cry and he is reducing me to tears, I have lost enthusiasm in many areas, cant make decisions.
      I also have spots over my face, I am battling to really take on board that he wont change, I still have kept hope but im banging my head against a brickwall.
      Might I feel like this as I can really see the reality and its so hard to face.
      Due to my disabilities I cannot leave but have left emotionally and do challenge him but feeling this past week heis getting the better of me, belittling all i say about his behavoir, I hoped with all my heart that he would seek help, even in the poistion we are in and he knows im not carryng on the falseness any more he just wont do anything.
      Feeling pretty hopeless and defeated

    • #18169
      Falling Skys
      Participant

      Hi and hugs

      I feel so much for your situation as I am for the time being stuck with my abuser, different reasons than yours.

      Part of the abusers way is to make you feel incapable of surviving without them. Alot of disable people live on their own with support I don’t know if it would be an option for you.

      It’s so unfair that you have no way out.

      FS xx

    • #18172
      Serenity
      Participant

      Sorry if I have forgotten details, Godschild- my brain is very foggy at the moment.

      Have you spoken to anyone about your set-up recently? Any authorities?

      I wish he could be told to go. Xx

    • #18193
      SaharaD
      Participant

      You can leave God’s child or rather make him leave.

      You can speak to social services to have a carer brought in. I have a carer who is much better than anything my abusive husband ever did.

      I get disability benefits and work 16 hours. I’m much better off now than with him. So much so I have a few thousand in the bank and went on a nice holiday in spite of my disability. Normally I’m I’ll half the time so I spend no money.

    • #18194
      godschild
      Participant

      Thankyou ladies for your support. I have both agoraphobia and monophobia a dreadful phobia of being alone. I have no support other than a hour once a fortnight on the phone to WA worker.
      (detail removed by moderator) its just the two of us.
      I had all manner of agencies at teh start of the year SS closed the case as I don’t need housing as I cannot live alone or go out alone.
      Shelter did the same.
      Community mental heath services said their service had nothing to offer offer me it was so stressful seeing them all and never ending calls they did not get back to me and it was call after call, all for nothing the same answer everywhere I dont fit their criteria.
      Both of my disabilites are very very long term and ive had all manner of treatments for decades.
      But thanks for replies anyway x

    • #18196
      Falling Skys
      Participant

      Hugs xx

      FS xx

    • #18198
      godschild
      Participant

      Thankyou FS xx

    • #18202
      SaharaD
      Participant

      They haven’t got the hospital beds anymore to admit people who are not suicidal and who are still in touch with reality.

      I had an episode in December but they only kept me for five days over the weekend.

      I had my own room. I didn’t have to come out if I didn’t want to.

      My carer comes to see me to get me outside. She can come 5 hours a week if I need her to.

      I get Pip so I use that to pay her because I’m still going through a social services assessment.

      Do you get any disability benefits or welfare help… Like a mobility car?

      I think if you aren’t able to ask for help unfortunately nothing will change.

      As they say doing the same thing in the same circumstances and expecting different results.

    • #18205
      godschild
      Participant

      I get disabilty living allowance at the lowest rate as I cant go out alone. I did have a blue badge as parking close to places really helped that was taken off me after 9 years i fought in every way to get it back but they will not budge.
      I really need some deep councelling but NHS dont offer anything in my area anmd noone proivides for agoraphobics who cannot go to built up areas, I have had decades of it all and nothing changes in fact it has got worse.

    • #18206
      SaharaD
      Participant

      I have a mental health advocate who is helping me with the social services assessment. So maybe you need an advocate. They do all of the running around and calling and emailing so you only have one person to speak to and avoid getting confused.

      You should contact MIND to see if they have one in your Area. An independent Mental Health Advocate.

    • #18201
      godschild
      Participant

      Thankyou (detail removed by moderator), Good to know you understand how it is. I had to change support worker as the first one left, its gone down to an hour every two weeks instead of weekly now so im really feeling that and it finishes in July, she is very strict about the hour the old one often went over but last time I was upset about not seeing my son and the call ended pretty abruptly ans I was then to wait 2 weeks.
      The phyciatrist acted as though my agoraphobia and monphobia are just part of my life with it being long term, they as you say only take action if you are phycotic or suicidal and i wouldnt tell then if I felt I was as what could be worse than being put in a hospital with agoraphobia.
      A GP said to me years ago that I manage my illness best myself that is the easy way out for them, I have had some pretty barabaric so called treatment over the years and very unkind idiot phyciatrists and phyciatric nurses I steer clear of them now but did think that Community mental health team might at least be able to offer me some support at home even just talking to some one. Good to know you are there and understand the agoraphobia and the hopeless situation with no real answer, I don’t feel so alone, glad to have been able to encourage you as well hugs to you

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