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The impact of domestic violence on children: a developmental perspective
The empirical evidence suggests that growing up in an abusive home environment can critically jeopardize the developmental progress and personal ability of children (Martin, 2002; McIntosh, 2002), the cumulative effect of which may
be carried into adulthood and can contribute significantly to the cycle of adversity and violence (Cunningham & Baker,
2004; Levendosky & Graham-Bermann, 1998). Exposure to domestic violence may have a varied impact at different stages
(Cunningham & Baker, 2004), with early and prolonged exposure potentially creating more severe problems because it affects
the subsequent chain of development.
Infants and toddlers are totally dependent upon others for care and their lives are organized around the primary attachment relationship to a care-giver, usually their mother. Distress may manifest itself behaviorally in excessive irritability,
regressed behavior around language and toilet-training (Osofsky, 1999); sleep disturbances, emotional distress and a fear of
being alone (Lundy & Grossman, 2005). Edleson’s (1999) review of the literature concluded that a toddler’s need for adults
to provide structure because of their developmental inability to understand and control their own emotions, may be difficult
to meet by depressed and overwhelmed mothers, thus impacting the child’s experience of emotional expression. Exploring
this further, Lundy and Grossman (2005) analyzed data collected between 1990 and 1995 from approximately 50 domestic
violence agencies in Illinois regarding the characteristics, difficulties and needs of 40,636 children aged 1–12 years, who used
one of these services with an adult client during this time period. Lundy and Grossman (2005) found that toddlers actually
seemed to exhibit emotionally distressed behavior less often than older children, a finding resonating in Bogat, DeJonghe,
Levendosky, Davidson, and Von Eye (2006) later, if considerably smaller study involving 48 mothers of infants. The women
were recruited during pregnancy from a wide range of sources including public settings, prenatal clinics and social services
programs. These women had experienced domestic violence during pregnancy and indicated that their infants had seen or
heard one or more abusive incidents. While Bogat et al. (2006) found that only 44% of infants exposed to domestic violence
had at least one trauma symptom, compared with the majority of pre-school and school-age children, Lundy and Grossman
(2005) found that more than any other age group, these youngest children appeared to have difficulty separating from
parents, perhaps reflecting problematic attachments.
Concurring with this, Martin’s (2002) review of the literature suggests that the dynamics of domestic violence undermine
the child’s developmental need for safety and security, potentially resulting in a difficulty developing a logical approach for
getting comfort, and in the development of disorganized attachments to their mothers, who is simultaneously a source
of comfort and fear for the child (McIntosh, 2002). If unabated, Martin (2002) concluded that such attachments result
in the infant being chronically overwhelmed, and if uninterrupted, this pattern could have devastating developmental
consequences for the child, underpinning much of the intergenerational cycle of domestic violence (Zeanah et al., 1999).
Both Rossman (1998) and Huth-Bocks, Levendosky, and Semel (2001) posit that pre-schoolers who witness violence have
more behavioral problems, social problems, post-traumatic stress symptoms, greater difficulty developing empathy, and
poorer self-esteem than non-witnesses. The effects of domestic violence are amplified for these young children, who are
completely dependent on parents for all aspects of their care and may therefore witness greater amounts of violence than
older children (Huth-Bocks et al., 2001). Not surprisingly, research with their mothers found this age group to exhibit more
problems, with care-giving more difficult than any other age group (Levendosky et al., 2003). Their developmentally limited
ability to verbalize the powerful emotions they are experiencing may manifest itself in temper tantrums and aggression,
crying and resisting comfort, or despondency and anxiety (Cunningham & Baker, 2004). While Lundy and Grossman’s study
(2005) found that aggressive behavior and possessiveness were particular problems for this age group, Martin (2002) surmised that extreme fear may result in psychosomatic problems such as headaches, stomach aches and asthma, as well as
insomnia, nightmares, sleepwalking and enuresis. The ego-centrism of children of this age may be reflected in a preoccupa-
S. Holt et al. / Child Abuse & Neglect 32 (2008) 797–810 803
tion with fear for their own safety, and they may engage in mental and behavioral disengagements in an effort to cope with
this distress (Cunningham & Baker, 2004).
School-age children (6–12 years) are involved in developing a more sophisticated emotional awareness of themselves
and others, in particular of how the abuse is affecting their mothers (Daniel, Wassell, & Gilligan, 1999). They are also able
to think in more complex ways about the reasons for the violence, and may try to predict and prevent the abuse based on
this reasoning. Younger children in this developmental stage are still thinking ego-centrically and may blame themselves for
their mother’s abuse, absorbing guilt and self-blame. In working things out, they will try to rationalize their father’s behavior,
justifying it on the basis of alcohol, stress, or bad behavior on theirs or their mother’s behalf, helping them cope with the idea
that their father is bad or imperfect in any way. If inappropriate or inaccurate attitudes and beliefs are not addressed, the
child is potentially at risk of adopting anti-social rationales for their own abusive behavior, where this occurs (Cunningham
& Baker, 2004).
For school-age children, academic and social success at school has a primary impact on their self-concept. As children rely
increasingly more on influences outside the family as role models and as indicators of their own worth (Daniel et al., 1999),
most children will hide their “secret” from everyone, because if others found out, the shame would be devastating, further
compounding the imbuing sense of sadness and vulnerability (Alexander, Macdonald, & Paton, 2005). With the development
and preservation of friendships a fundamental part of this developmental stage, Lundy and Grossman (2005) believe that
social problems including poor social skills, may make this developmental task unachievable. They may either pick up on
and react to aggressive cues in their interactions with other children and consequently be at risk of bullying or tune out from
such cues and be at increased risk of being bullied (Bauer et al., 2006; Cunningham & Baker, 2004). One-third of Lundy and
Grossman’s (2005) sample of 4,636 children who were exposed to domestic violence were described as frequently aggressive,
and one-fifth had difficulties adhering to the rules of the school, with the acting out, peer difficulties, sadness and depression
of this peer group frequently bringing them to the attention of the teachers. The first US study to examine the relationship
between domestic violence exposure and bullying corroborated this finding that children exposed to violence engaged in
higher level of generalized aggression (Bauer et al., 2006). Furthermore, the child’s learning potential may be compromised
by poorly developed verbal skills (Moore & Pepler, 1998), competing demands for their energy, exhaustion or absenteeism.
Alternatively school is experienced as a respite and engaged in fully, both to maximise the respite and to avoid going home.
Adolescence may mark the point when the impact of domestic violence extends beyond the boundary of the family, with
difficulty forming healthy intimate relationships with peers due to the models they experienced in their family (Levendosky,
Huth-Bocks, & Semel, 2002). Research suggests exposed adolescents are less likely to have a secure attachment style and
more likely to have an avoidant attachment style, indicating perhaps that they no longer feel trust in intimate relationships
(Levendosky et al., 2002). Reflecting on the findings of their research, Levendosky and her colleagues (2002) speculated
that abusive patterns in intimate relationships initiated in adolescence, may well lead to violence on the part of men and
victimization on the part of women in their adult relationships.
Wekerle and Wolfe (1999) found exposure to violence in the home to be the best predictor of adolescent male abusive
behavior and a significant predictor of male and female experiences of victimization in intimate relationships. In contrast,
Levendosky et al.’s study (2002) with 111 exposed adolescents found they were more likely to be victimized, lending some
support to the intergenerational transmission of violence hypothesis. On a similar theme, the young people in Goldblatt’s
(2003) study doubted their competency to become non-violent partners and were ambivalent about their ability to control
themselves.
Coping strategies for this developmental stage include mental or emotional disengagement involving both tuning out by
listening to music or positioning themselves away from the violence, with more hazardous efforts involving experimentation
with alcohol and other mood altering substances (Cunningham & Baker, 2004; Mullender et al., 2002). As children get older,
they may become more active and focused in trying to prevent or intervene in the abuse, or in providing emotional or
practical support to their mother (Hester et al., 2000). Anger may be directed at the abuser for the violence or at the mother
for perceived failure to protect, inability to leave or returning to the abuser. Adolescents may adopt care-taking roles for
their mother and siblings, and although this can empower by providing a sense of control in an otherwise out of control
environment, Goldblatt (2003) cautions that the cost of over parentification is a lost childhood and the likelihood of severe
emotional distress. -
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